In some ways

I'm still the fat little kid on the playground doing anything to make the other children like me, only I'm doing it in a world of adults where they just care about getting things done and other grown-up issues. So I admitted after talking to YKWIA today. Even after all these years, I'm still pretty insecure, and although it normally doesn't happen, the fact is that sometimes I react to that perceived rejection just like I did when I was a kid. So that's something to work on.

I feel much better today. One of the people involved talked to me about it and it was clear that all of us shared some blame for things not running all that smoothly, and there was some miscommunication. I felt better afterwards. Ironically, the whole thing that was time-sensitive in the first place wound up being cancelled.

Anyway, I managed to catch up at work today, and then I took my friends to Coba Cocina, a restaurant here in Lexington, for their anniversary. I then went to a comic store and picked up a couple of the latest issue of Sandman: Overture (there were two covers). I ate at Subway and then went to Gabriel Brothers and found a couple of bras, a dress, a backpack purse, socks, and a blouse for very little, really. The bras, for example, were Lane Bryant's brand, but were only $4.99 (normally about $30 or so). I really needed something off-white, so it was nice to find some. I really like the dress, and it was $13. It's a pretty summery dress in cool tones of blue, green, and purple with an asymmetric hem and lavender lining. The blouse is lacy and flowery, white with pink flowers. So all in all, it went well. I probably had no business going there given how stressed I was over money yesterday, though.

I went to get them, took them on a very abbreviated grocery run for some essentials, and got them home. One had had some sangria. He's such a happy drunk. He grabbed some things from the car because they were shiny (a bracelet, a dangling crystal, and my purple phone charger), lost the house briefly, went inside, and apparently fell asleep immediately, only to give them to the other as a present later. (I got a phone call checking to make sure I got home and thanking me for my help in making the evening a nice one.) A has put them somewhere safe so dogs don't chew them up. I just shook my head. A is going to go watch the University of Kentucky-University of Louisville game (along with most people in our state, for that matter).

I've taken my medicine, propped myself up in bed, and I'm listening to Passenger's All the Little Lights. I've got the fan on, which feels very nice on my feet. The only thing that could make things better would be a cat curled up with me, but alas, there is none. I checked the other day and the little cat Nedra that spent so many months at the shelter is gone. I hope she found a good home. I don't really regret not getting her--I think I'm just not ready for pets beside fish right now. But I hope someone cares about her and takes care of her well.

Okay, I think I'm going to sign off for now. I'm so glad it's Friday. Hope you have a good weekend. Good night.