Up paying bills

I get paid on Thursdays, but the money usually hits my account about 11:30 the night before. My account has been in horrible shape of late, as a bill went through that the bank paid but I didn't have sufficient funds for. Thankfully, it was paid, as it was my car insurance, but I haven't been able to pay anything for about a week, and I'm woefully behind in all sorts of ways. Between the trip (I'm still waiting on a reimbursement cheque from the college) and the brakes (although thankfully those weren't extremely expensive) and the choice to at least pay my rent on time, I've been behind. So I sat down around midnight and paid my cell phone, electricity, and broadband bills. A couple of bills come out automatically in a day. Tomorrow I'll sit down and look at what else I can pay, and try to get as much taken care of as possible. If you happen to be a creditor reading this, I really am trying to get everything taken care of. And I am looking for a full-time library job that would pay better than my library/data entry combination. At the rate I'm going, I've been seriously considering trying to get a part-time job on top of my 40 hours I work at the hospital. Of course, I would be in better shape if a 'friend' who borrowed money from me had ever even made any attempt to pay me what he owes me. During the time when I (uncharacteristically) had money after the accident where I was hit with the car, I had a friend in dire straits who continually hit me up for money for him and his family, saying he would pay me back as soon as possible. Being the gullible and soft-hearted person I am, I believed him. (The fact that I had just had a scary experience that could have been deadly and was in pain and on medication at least part of that time didn't really help. He literally asked for money within a few days after I was hit.) Anyway, he took advantage of that friendship, and borrowed quite a bit of money, enough that if I sued him, it would be out of small claims court. Whenever I've tried to talk to him about it, he tries to guilt me into thinking I'm a bad person for wanting my money back, and says I only talk to him to bring it up anymore. Sadly, our friendship, such as it was, and I thought it was greater than it was, suffered. On the other hand, I've never successfully confronted him or his wife on the issue. But I now understand why no one in his family would help him, especially when he got stranded in South Carolina during an impromptu visit to the beach without cash after the vow renewal they put together the same year they were borrowing from me for rent and Christmas presents for the kids, and for that matter, part of the vow renewal. In his defence, he did repay me for getting them back from being stranded, but that's the only payment on the total I received after months of panicked 'I hate to ask you, but....' I really do feel used and totally gullible for believing that he was a good friend. On the other hand, I recognise that I was so desperate for friendship that I was willing to give money that I would need later to someone even against my better judgement. So it was a perfect storm of problems. But beyond the money, I was a really good friend to him, and was very supportive when he was struggling with illness and transitioning from working to disability, and I really deserved better from him. And I resent the guilt he tried to lay on me. I hope he at least has the good graces to feel a little guilt when he thinks of me, but I doubt it. I suspect I am one in a long line of people he's done this to, given his family's response. And that's sad. Still, it makes me appreciate the friends I do have who don't leech off of me, and when they do have me pick up something for them or whatever, they actually pay me back.

Well that's enough of that. I should head on to bed. Things will get better with time, I hope.