Things you shouldn't tell a woman who's just had a miscarriage...

(and for the record I didn't; these gems were all from the same clueless person who as near as I can see has his head stuck somewhere far from reality)

1. I know just how you feel. (Especially if you are male.)
   
2. I broke up with someone/lost a girlfriend (who's still alive), so I understand.
   
3. I had a bad feeling because I had the flu and then this haemorrhoid. I understand the pain you're going through.
   
4. (When informed by his own mother that no, she didn't have a miscarriage) Thanks for being a good mom and not having a miscarriage with me (the implication being that somehow the person wasn't good enough, when in fact, she's been through hell to have a child).
   
5. At least you're married and might have a kid (nevermind she's been fighting infertility, and this pregnancy happened after a potentially fatal complication and in vitro). I don't even have a girlfriend.
   
6. I blame your dead ex-boyfriend who also happened to be my best friend (even though that has nothing to do with situation whatsoever).
   

I would like to give the person the benefit of the doubt...I don't think he was trying to malicious, just self-centred and clueless. And the person he said those things to tends not to tell people what a jerk they're being; even though she was hurt, she just said she was going to end the conversation because he was starting to piss her off (I think she was afraid to say something she might regret later. Pity he didn't feel the same). I doubt he even realised how hurtful those things were or how disappointing. I mean, it's one thing if a casual acquaintance said it. It's another when it's someone who's been there for you over the years and then suddenly it's like they're a pod person. And I won't name names, but it's entirely possible he'll read this, and I hope he thinks about it and realises just how...well...I can't describe it without swearing...it was.