I am vexed

after working several hours with someone who is very young (20) and for that reason I am trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, but after several instances of her disappearing to smoke or chat on the phone outside, announcing when she had to pee, generally trying to tell me all about her life (and not succeeding, because I ignored her), going on and on about how she came from a much busier store and can handle so much but won't even lift a finger to make a pot of coffee, I suspect that there will be a point where the quiet seething will raise its ugly head and I'm going to snap at her. It's like listening to fingernails on chalkboard, albeit in a sweet high inane voice.

The sad thing is I must wonder if I was like that at that age. I'd given my brain over to someone I thought loved me, I said the most stupid things at time, and some people were convinced I had no personality of my own. I was also self-absorbed and had no social skills.

And because of that I'm really trying to not snap at her, but it's wearing thin...of course, I'm not like that anymore in part because someone else took the time to put me under his wing and for all intents and purposes raised me in my 20s and 30s. And I seem to recall he snapped a time or two. :) But he has the patience of a saint, and I do not, and so help me, if I snap at her, it's not going to be pretty, and I'll probably hurt her feelings.

On the other hand, that's rather freeing at times. We worry ever so much about other people's feelings sometimes that we don't tell them what they need to hear.

I don't want her to be instantly mature. I'd just settle for getting some work out of her so I don't have to do all the little things we do to keep the store running--things I tried to do but couldn't always accomplish because she kept disappearing on me.