Grrr....

So one benefit of Zoom is allowing one to check up on people you care about who otherwise have no voice. Discovered today that a friend in hospice has been without his morphine due to someone's incompetence, whether it be in the nursing home, the prescribing office, or elsewhere. Not acceptable. 

Whew!

So I came home last night all wound up after two or three days of working multiple freaking miracles in terms of scheduling same-day or within the next couple of days imaging exams, and my roommate pointed out that I was acting a bit manic, talking a mile a minute with push of speech. Which is true. And I will probably crash this weekend from the results of too much adrenaline this week. But while mania and hypomania are never really desirable, and have a host of problems if prolonged, a little extra zing in my step really helped this week. This proves that even challenges can be helpful if channelled correctly. I spent a lot of time this week using the Pomodoro technique to focus (you use a timer--such as an app I use called Focus To Do--for 25 minutes of focused work, followed by 5 minutes' rest, repeat, until a few cycles and then you get a 15 minute break--it's called Pomodoro from the Italian for tomato, because a lot of early kitchen timers were in that shape). Anyway, it really helped this week, along with taking some of my boss' suggestions for organising, and it really cut down on my scheduling time. I guess all those time management books I've been checking out from the library are starting to help, too. 🙂 Now if I can just get comfortable asking for help rather than trying to please everyone when I'm drowning. I'm still trying to figure out this thing we call life. I think we all are.

Feeling relieved

So back in November, I called to make a mammogram appointment because I'd last had one a couple of years before and I'd put it off, mainly due to COVID. I needed a late appointment, which pushed it out to January 18th, but that was okay, I figured. I went and got it, didn't think much about it, and had decided that all must be fine or they'd have called me, and I'd probably get something in the mail in 2-4 weeks (or more, given the challenges of getting anything through the Postal Service these days).

Then they called.

It was all matter-of-a-fact. There was need for a diagnostic mammogram because of something on the images. I was in enough shock I didn't ask what it was. At the urging of a co-worker who has been through cancer and was talking me down from a panic attack, I called back and was told it had to do with assymetry, something showing up inside one breast but not the other, something not noticed on my previous imaging. I was to come today for that mammogram and prepare to stay one to three hours in case there was need for an ultrasound or biopsy.

Fortunately we've been dealing with ice in our area, so I haven't had much chance to overly worry. But I went today and had just the left breast scanned, and then sat in the waiting room in my little half-gown wondering how it would come out. Then someone called my name, told me I was free to go, and took me to the changing room and showed me the results were normal, that it was just normal tissue. I was very much relieved, dressed, went back to the car, and texted my friends at work--two of whom were not so lucky to get good news--my results. All in all I was in there about 37 minutes, only about 25 past my appointment time. It was over very quickly, and that was great. But there were other women who were there, and I remember one pacing in the hallway, others quietly introspective. One of them might not be getting good news.

So that was the sum of my little scare, but it all came out happy in the end. Thank you so much to Jessica, who talked me through the panic and got me to seek as much information from them so I could empower a sense of calm.

Ice storm!

A bottle of deicer I bought on Amazon and had delivered last week got me to work this morning, a little late, but overall it went pretty well. I got the car door open within a couple of minutes.  It took another hour or so to get the windows as clear as I could of ice, and then a slow trip for the four miles to work.  I usually clock in at 8:30 am, and I made it there between 9:10 and 9:30 am (I'm not sure of the exact time, as I was kind of tired by that time and was just thankful to have made it to the Orange Lot at UK, walked to the shuttle, rode the shuttle, and then walked from the other side of the UK hospital to my workplace.   The only dicey part actually was crossing South Limestone at Conn Terrace, especially as the sidewalks were clear and salted, but didn't have the little bit of snow on them for traction.  The pictures are of what I found outside the house this morning.  The trickiest part was getting the limb off the porch without falling off the porch.  This is now the fifth major ice storm I've been in (four in Kentucky, one in South Carolina of all places, with seven inches of snow right outside Myrtle Beach, where I lived when I was about five because there was an Air Force base there). Anyway, I managed to get a lot of work finished because there weren't many e-mail of phone call interruptions. :) I got home after 6:30 pm because I had to go to the pharmacy (I was out of insulin pen needles), get gas, and get a few things at the grocery.  It was definitely re-freezing once the sun was down.  Now I'm safely at home, letting the bread dough rise, and thankful to be inside.  We lost power for just a couple of hours last night. Fingers crossed, I hope we don't have a repeat, as I couldn't sleep without my CPAP that whole time. 

Also, a big thank you to the gentleman who, seeing me struggle to spray and pry ice off of my gas cap cover for five minutes, help me get the last of it off so I could open my tank and fill up. 

Ugh

It's 9 pm on a Friday night and both my roommate and I are headed for bed. He cooked and did a lot today at home. I worked really hard despite less than 4 hours of sleep and forgetting to take my meds till about 3:30 pm. Also, I hurt all over tonight (a fibromyalgia flare up) but also my knee is throbbing so badly I can barely walk, and it's swollen. I haven't done anything to it recently. It took three ibuprofen and ice to get where I could do the dishes. I tore my meniscus when I fell in February of last year, but not to the point of surgery. I think I've somehow irritated that. I'm off it now; hopefully it goes back to its normal, everyday osteoarthritis pain. Good night.

Back on the phone

Which reminds me. My roommate is right.  This is just a sickness. I have to match everything.  If I wear a purple blouse, then I'll match my coat, my gloves, my jewelry, even my underwear and such to the purple.  Even in the days of Covid, I match my mask to what I wear.  My shoes are usually black, as are my pants.  But I then have to match my phone case.  In the past, I've had something like 10 phone cases per phone (over a 3-4 year period, Mind you). I told myself that when I got this phone, I'd keep it to a minimum. So I have a grey wallet case and a dark greyish black one I can charge with, which pretty much go with everything, although my roommate, an artist, was quick to point out grey doesn't go with red (I disagree) or yellow (I never wear that). I did break down and get a case that is clear with blue and purple, the two colours I wear the most on it. So then I had to choose a theme that I had to go with it.  I chose the butterfly one that has blue and purple.  (Butterflies have special significance to me, and my middle name (or one of them, anyway) means butterfly in Welsh.) But that was not enough... behold, a butterfly on my watch. 

PS I would have preferred silver or black to rose gold for the watch, but that was the one they had and had the special on.  It does work, it's just all my jewelry, such as it is, is silver, except for gold-surrounded Victorian penny that I keep an old gold chain for that was my great-grandmother's.

It's not like I don't have books

Out from the library. :) I need to do some reading. 

Can you tell

I'm up early and have the computer all to myself? Just one more post for now.

So I got a bit of a scare the other day. On the 18th, I went to get a screening mammogram. It's been about 2 1/2 years since my last one, due to COVID, as I'd planned to get one last spring, and then when I made the appointment a couple of months ago it took a bit to get a late evening appointment.

I hadn't heard anything for a week, so I figured they'd just send me a letter saying everything was okay. Then I got a phone call a few days ago asking me to come in for another mammogram, which would be diagnostic, as the radiologist had seen something and wanted more data, and to be prepared to spend 1-3 hours there.

No one wants that call.

Now as you know, I live with a lot of anxiety, and I was really trying to not go into panic mode. I talked to a co-worker who's been through breast cancer and she suggested I call back for more information as to the indications for the new test. After playing phone tag, I got a call from a nurse saying there was no visible mass, but that there was an asymmetry in the left breast they wanted to investigate further. I just assumed that meant there was something different in the left breast vs. the right, and that's true, but it's a specific term in mammography, unrelated to say, differences in size for the breasts. From the summary of an abstract for an article relating a case-study of missed malignancy diagnosis in breast asymmetry:

Summary. The developing asymmetry has a 12–15% risk of malignancy but poses challenges of detection and interpretation due to the lack of typical features of cancer and the frequent absence of an ultrasound correlate. Failure to biopsy these lesions may lead to delayed diagnosis of breast cancer.

Also from the article itself:

Asymmetry and developing asymmetry are seen on 3.3% and 0.16% of screening mammograms respectively. An asymmetry is highly likely to be benign, with the likelihood of malignancy reported at 1.8%. However, 12.8% of the developing asymmetries identified on screening are malignant and therefore these findings require biopsy.

So, it's highly unlikely that it's malignant. They just want to verify that it's not of concern. The radiologist will read it while I'm there. If there is concern, they'll do a biopsy while I'm there, which is why I have to plan on being there so long.

Anyway, I'm glad my co-worker was there to talk to and she really helped. Hopefully it will be nothing. I'll write more when I know more.

It's especially important that I keep the kitten out of my room these days

Because my aloe is getting ready to bloom, and I'm so excited, as I've never seen one do that! It came out of the blue and was quite a bit up before I even noticed it. I went to check the orchids for spikes, and there it was! I'll update with pictures when (and if) it opens.

Yay!

So I didn't mention this before, but one good thing about working in health care is that I had the opportunity to get the COVID-19 vaccine as part of the first group, 1a. We weren't able to get it at work, but the Lexington Fayette Health Department has been running clinics to help those who work in smaller facilities such as us, or doctor's offices, etc., get it. So I went and got the first dose on December 30th of the Moderna vaccine over lunch (we found out about it just in time to sign up, the day before, and my boss let me take a longer lunch than normal and I had to miss my one regular meeting a week, but I got the other person to back me up, so it all worked out). I had almost no side effects--the shot itself barely hurt, I had the slightest of headaches that afternoon (but rain was coming in the next day, so it could be sinus-related), and then the next day the site itched for all of five minutes. I tracked everything through the CDC's V-safe program, where they text you for a week after the vaccination, then weekly, with a short questionnaire to track side effects. Then I got the notification to come back this past Wednesday, January 27th, and did the whole thing over again.

This time I got it in my left arm, which may have been an issue. Like the flu shot, which can make your arm sore, I'd suggest getting it in your dominant arm because you use the muscles more and it would work out the soreness easier. I got it in my right arm last time. Anyway, I did have more symptoms afterwards, and they warn you that it's more common with the second shot, as your immune system is ramping up. I had a little headache that afternoon, my arm got very sore, I had muscle aches, both meaning I had trouble sleeping that night, and there was redness and a bit of swelling at the site, and it itched--a lot. I put that all in the program, too. :) Anyway, the soreness is gone. A few people who went on Wednesday actually had to call in to work as they had a fever, etc. But it was so worth it. Considering the symptoms of COVID and my underlying conditions, it was a walk in the park. Now if we can just get my roommate, who is in 1c, vaccinated, I'll feel a lot better. I've signed him up through the University of Kentucky site, but they're not vaccinating that group yet. But they're supposed to contact him when it's time.