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Saturday, February 03, 2024

So I didn't quite make it daily, but here is the second one

 From Marcus Aurelius' Meditations

Book I. XVI.


Whatsoever I am, is either flesh, or life, or that which we commonly call the mistress and overruling part of man; reason. Away with thy books, suffer not thy mind any more to be distracted, and carried to and fro; for it will not be; but as even now ready to die, think little of thy flesh: nerves, veins, and arteries; think no more of it, than so. And as for thy life, consider what it is; a wind; not one constant wind neither, but every moment of an hour let out, and sucked in again. The third, is thy ruling part, and her consider; Thou art an old man; suffer not that excellent part to be brought in subjection, and to become slavish; suffer it not to be drawn up and down with unreasonable and unsociable lusts and motions, as it were with wires and nerves; suffer it not any more, either to repine at anything now present, or to fear and fly anything to come,, which the destiny hath appointed thee.

So reason is what should be valued most, as that which should rule the body and spirit, and which also must be cultivated so that it does not become distracted with emotional desires, or for that matter, I think he would agree, minor matters of no consequence.

This is so hard for me, especially because I have a mood disorder. Without my medicine, I become very labile. And beyond my ADHD, I get so distracted by what is happening in my present life, as well as anxiety for the future, that I don't actually think things through a lot. I have a fairly high IQ (149), and I used to be good at recitation and learning, and I certainly learned critical thinking (mainly studying history at university), but I don't apply them to my life. I've always compartmentalised my theoretical knowledge and actual real-life applications. As a whole, I do much better at theory than practical/applied actions. And I hate that, but I've gotten used to not really thinking much. And that is sad. I'm trying to read more to stimulate my brain (although he specifically values reasoning over learning from others, including through books). I need to really start considering subjects, ruminating upon them, and coming up with reasoned outcomes, hence these exercises.  There you go, that's how this section applies to my life, and I need to take it to heart and really improve my thinking, which will, in turn, improve my life.  In short, I need to stop being lazy in my thinking.

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