Unshelved by Bill Barnes and Gene Ambaum
comic strip overdue media

Thursday, June 12, 2003

Settling in for the evening...



I had a fairly uneventful day at work. I had a co-worker who was so happy with some of my work that she hugged me. That was a little freaky, but I find that as I learn to open up more, I not only deal with huggy people better, I'm learning to like it. It was just a banner for her son (who didn't have to go to Iraq, and is coming home), so I think the happiness was mostly for him. But I just patted her on her back and told her I was glad her son was coming home. I'm sure she's relieved. But mostly my day was spent on the computer, filling requests, etc.

Remember the choose-your-own adventure books? Well, the normalcy at work was an interesting backdrop to the drama going on behind the scenes (if you really want to read the drama, check out this). If you'd rather have no drama, click here. Otherwise, read on for a teensy bit of drama. Yup, I'm the person who apparently eats ice cream in a disgusting manner. No, I have no idea how that differs from anyone else's technique. I'm sure somehow it's all my fault in the end, it's always is, isn't it? . I was going to take the 'high road' and ignore this, but since I haven't been able to talk to her, and I don't want to waste any more of my time trying to get some closure, I guess I can go for a little drama of my own. I'll make it short. It's just as well, I suppose, that this has happened. I've been walking on eggshells for far too long around Zabet, who was the last of a long line of people with similar issues in my life. By way of illustration, she once sold me some videotapes that were going to a garage sale but would not even let me touch a book that was going into the sale because, in her words, 'I had enough books'. And that's a fairly minor example. In the years I've known her she has driven away nearly everyone she's ever been close to, and then blamed them--and blamed me for not going away, even though I would have at any time if actually asked-yet refused to get therapy and started to truly despise me once I did. She would often decide that current events, TV shows--anything she does not have control over in the conversation--is verboten in her house, but you wouldn't know until she blew up and told you not to speak about something. When I asked for help made me a project she could micromanage. She once literally took a keyboard out of my hands and then redesigned my blog because it didn't suit her otherwise. And yeah, I let her, so I suppose I deserved it. So then she had yet another blow-up (and for once, I didn't lay down and take it, so now what I thought was a nine-year friendship is over, which given the fact that despite the fact that I have cared for her, this by her own admission is not how she felt) just because I made a comment that a particularly disturbing dream was both sick and creative (let's face it, dreams are the product of our own minds). Instead of calling or otherwise contacting me directly she ripped her comments off her blog and had a temper tantrum and then posted the aforementioned diatribe. Considering at any time when she's had problems she has actively pushed everyone around her, I think that I did my best, considering that yes, I was dealing with issues in my own life, and quite frankly had other responsibilities to people who did not bring anything down on themselves or abuse me, and she supposedly had other great friends to help her. Friends she later treated like dirt and pushed away. She had singular moments of empathy for other people, but they were rare. When the Oklahoma City bombing took place, she was like, 'well, so? I didn't know anyone there'. She really only relates to cats well, and even then, it has to be on her terms. She takes it personally if they're not loving back. Despite the fact that I told myself she was growing up and getting better and defended her at her worst on many, many occasions, it was ultimately not worth it. When she felt she was left out I made time and this only led to her apparently despising me. She had done a lot for me but only on her terms, at her whim, and apparently without remembering all I've done for her in return. Sigh. I wonder if anyone has done a study on "break-ups by blogging"? I tried to phone several times, but could not reach her. I'm sure she's more comfortable with this. And before anyone cries foul, I have comments and she's welcome to leave whatever accusations she'd like on them, because I can ignore the irrational and not take it personally. Well, I wish her well (and therapy), and Patrick as well, since she apparently speaks for him. I hope they get what they truly want in life. I'm just not sure they'll be happy with it. And I do hope that he draws the line on occasion; she once told me his mom treats his dad like a remote-control carrying boy, and she does the exact same thing to Patrick.

Now for a little less drama.

Today I gave blood. This is always an adventure, but today I was prepared. I raided our lab, clinic, and occupational therapy departments for large latex-free gloves, cor-ban (the stick-to-itself bandage they use to wrap you up at the end), and a tourniquet. You'd think that if they're sending a bloodmobile to a hospital that is virtually latex-free, and they themselves are at risk for developing latex allergy, that they'd have better supplies. But their nitrile gloves are normally available just in small, which sucks for the phlebotomist who gets me. They used to have to put a blood pressure cuff on me instead of a tourniquet. Last time we went with paper tape since they didn't have cor-ban without latex, so they used paper tape and I had a bad bruise for awhile. This time, I had everything put together before I went in, and they were pleasantly surprised. I was halfway afraid I'd be deferred due to low blood iron or such, but thankfully, no. My blood pressure and temp were actually a bit low, but the blood drop sank right down the solution. They always have to ask my occupation because apparently 'librarian' is not one of the standard professions they have in their database, and I think it always surprises them that a hospital would have a librarian. There were new questions (there are always). Last time the new questions were about smallpox shots. This time it was about SARS. There are some benefits to never having left the country or having...ahem...had sex for awhile, because it makes it so much quicker to answer the questions. The guy who took my blood had 'never met anyone with a latex allergy'. Aaron? Are you reading this? Hello, don't they give you all inservices? Maybe you should introduce yourself to the day shift? :) The nice thing is I didn't bruise at all this time. Maybe that scouting 'be prepared' thing has some merit.

After work I paid bills and bought a Father's Day card for my stepfather. Oooh. The first year as an official stepfather. Well, I adopted John awhile ago, of course. But he deserves a doubly-good day this year because he's now got his youngest out of high school and peace may eventually reign. Then I came home and made some phone calls and caught up on some game-related posts. I've been listening to a Geographic special on the sinking of the Lusitania whilst blogging. Now I think I'm going to do a little reading and head to bed a little early...of course, if I do that, I won't be doing the F5 at midnight. Oh, well, sometimes there are more important things than being first.

No comments: