Unshelved	by Bill Barnes and Gene Ambaum

I can't imagine what these people are going through

no matter how many news stories I read--and I grew up in Louisiana, so I'm at least familiar with the geography.

CNN.com - Conditions deteriorate in Katrina's wake - Aug 31, 2005

Want to help?

Katrina Help is a Wiki trying to coordinate some of the news, aid, and need in the area akin to the Tsunami Wiki it's modelled upon.

And of course, there's the American Red Cross, which could really use your donations right now...you can donate online or call 1.800.HELP.NOW.

I'm still trying to find out about my cousin Steve, who's an engineer in Mississippi, I think in Biloxi. Maybe he evacuated to his parents' in Georgia. I hope so. In the meantime, my prayers and thoughts are with everyone affected by this disaster.

Eilir raved on 15:00 Links to this post

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Well, it's still gloomy outside but I feel better

I spent the evening with D and her 4-month-old yesterday, and I feel a lot better today. We had a long talk, and I think just having a chance to see her and spend some time together really helped. We're really good at cheering the other up, and fortunately we tend to alternate 'bad days', so we're generally not having one the same day. She also fixed me some food to take home so I'm set until I get paid on Thursday. Today I lucked out, too, because all employees got a free meal since the cash register in the cafeteria went bonkers. Yay! It couldn't come at a better time, right before payday. So, my only concern at this point is having enough gas to last until Thursday, since my gas light is on and I have errands to run tomorrow. Otherwise, I'm doing pretty well.

We're getting the rain from now tropical storm Katrina, so we have a flood watch and the rain has just been very steady all day. But the rest of the week is supposed to be sunny. I'm looking forward to the three-day weekend coming up, too, although I don't really have any plans.

Well, that's enough for now; I just wanted to update things. Julie, when you read this, know I'm thinking of you and I'm glad you're doing better. For the rest of you, adieu until I write again.

PS My mom called this morning and told me my stepfather John was doing better. I hadn't blogged about it, but I was worried because he had septicaemia, probably getting an E. coli infection from a salad he'd eaten at a fast food chain. But he's back at work today and doing better. Go, John!

Eilir raved on 14:40 Links to this post

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It's a gloomy Monday

As we get loads of rain in anticipation of Katrina, whose remnants will hit Kentucky sometime late Tuesday/early Wednesday. We're aready expecting one to seven inches of rain, and of course flash flooding is a particular danger in Kentucky with its many waterways and valleys.

Here in Lexington it's been quite grey and dark both yesterday and today, with at times heavy rain but overall cooler, with temps just above 80 degrees, so it's given some relief to what has been a fairly hot summer.

My mood is a bit gloomy and a little lonely as well. Have you ever felt so overwhelmed by the day-to-day aspects of your life that you wanted to just walk away? I get to do that to some degree over the next month, not in terms of giving up being responsible for my own life, but an experiment of sorts to explore the quality of a relationship and all the responsibilities (and benefits) it entails. I won't go into it here to any great degree, but for September I'm going to have a lot of time to myself, hopefully to get my head on straight as a consequence. Or I suppose I might just spiral down. I'm not sure. It could go either way, I suppose. I hope this month will bring with it some greater appreciation and understanding of things.

Wednesday I have an appointment with my psychiatrist, then I go back into therapy starting the 14th. I'm hoping it will help, because I'm pissing people off without meaning to, and apparently I'm being just crazy enough to be annoying or frightening without really being aware of doing anything wrong, which isn't the greatest sign in the world. I usually have a little bit more insight than that. There seems to be something about this time of the year...four years ago I went into DBT because I was damaging friendships, and now, four years later, I'm not really sure I've gotten that much better. But I don't want to be a crazy person without friends, so I keep trying to get better. At least I'm not clinically depressed on top of things this time; I just have to deal with myself and my daemons.

I guess that's it for now. I know this post seems fractured, because I can't really candidly type it all out without violating a promise. And in typical blogger fashion, it seems all about me. It's not, not really, but it's all I can blog about at this point. I know things will probably get better, and that seventeen years won't just evaporate overnight. I just hope I haven't been eroding things to a breaking point. I'll know in a little over a month. You'll know from my mood how things have gone, no doubt. If you know me in real life, this might make sense, or may not. At this point I don't much care. What matters is I'll know what it means, and I can look back at this as a turning point for good or bad.

I just hope things work out for the best for all concerned.

Eilir raved on 09:13 Links to this post

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Reading + Environmental Awareness = Win, Win

Read a Book...Save the Planet is s Scottish initiative aimed at getting kids to turn off their TVs and video games and read/visit libraries instead. It mixes the love of reading with conserving electrical energy. Now if they just add walking to the local library if possible (or biking), with exercise in the mix, it'd be pretty much perfect. Although with the way neighbourhoods are designed these days, I don't know how many kids can safely walk to their local library. Still...it's a nice idea.

Eilir raved on 09:09 Links to this post

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Beware the Blog

Yet another story on the scope and consequences of blogging.

Eilir raved on 09:33 Links to this post

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For Julie

who's been in and out of the hospital several times over the past few weeks. Know that I'm thinking of you and I hope that everything goes well. Hope to see you soon up and fine. Take care.

Eilir raved on 15:36 Links to this post

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Ruminating

This song by Staind has haunted me of late

I know I've been mistaken
But just give me a break and see the changes that I've made
I've got some imperfections
But how can you collect them all and throw them in my face

But you always find a way to keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if you chose to walk away I'd still be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep you right here waiting

I hope you're not intending
To be so condescending it's as much as i can take
and you're so independent
you just refuse to bend so I keep bending till I break

But you always find a way to keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if you chose to walk away I'd still be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep you right here waiting

I've made a commitment
I'm willing to bleed for you
I needed fulfillment
I found what I need in you

Why can't you just forgive me
I don't want to relive all the mistakes I've made along the way
But I always find a way to keep you right here waiting
I always find the words to say to keep you right here waiting

But you always find a way
To keep me right here waiting
You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting
And if I chose to walk away would you be right here waiting
Searching for the things to say to keep me right here waiting

Eilir raved on 09:24 Links to this post

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Mulling Over the Menezes Affair

I came across this, from : Who Knows Where Thoughts Come From, as reported in BBC NEWS UK Magazine Blog in haste, repent at leisure?:

It's a strange contrast between the treatment of the leaker (suspended from work) to the treatment of the assassin (distinctly not suspended; given an expenses paid holiday though). It would make you think that exposing the truth is a worse crime than killing an innocent man.

Indeed. I don't know if the whole truth in this case has yet played out, but certainly the scrutiny should bring out quite a bit in the details, hopefully in a way that will prevent further loss of innocent life.

Eilir raved on 10:45 Links to this post

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This vending machine won't bloat you with calories

...but you can choose from 25 different contemporary and classic books for your ride on the Metro. :)

Guardian Unlimited Special reports A book emergency? No problem

Eilir raved on 09:55 Links to this post

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Far too little way too late, but I'm glad they got them

Interned Japanese-Americans Get Diplomas

Eilir raved on 08:53 Links to this post

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Received this today and thought I'd post it here

so that others who may not be on the list can read and respond...

Dear Friend:

Whether helping rebuild after the tsunami or working in our own communities, Americans have shown again and again we are a compassionate country. Many of us have been following the tragic events unfolding in Niger, a West African nation facing a famine affecting close to 4 million people.

That's a big number - about the same number of people as live in a state like Kentucky, and even more people than live in Iowa or New Hampshire. And any American farmer can tell you that when a community is forced to eat the seed they should be saving to plant for next year's harvest, the situation is very serious - and maybe even hard for us to see or really understand.
There is hope. In addition to helping today, America can also act to fight future famines in other countries like Niger. Because of effective international assistance and the hard work of local people, in the past 10 years, Mozambique has moved from being a war-torn nation to one of the world's five fastest-growing economies - even after two catastrophic floods. With the help of the United States and other countries doing their part, Mozambique's people are fighting corruption and building hospitals, schools and most importantly, the future of their nation.

By allocating an additional ONE percent of the U.S. budget toward providing basic needs like health, education, clean water and food, we can transform the hopes of an entire generation in the world's poorest countries, and help them move from fighting famine and other disasters towards promoting self-sustaining development. Directed to honest governments, private charities and faith-based organizations, this increased support would provide the tools and resources people need to really make a difference, helping them to help themselves.

Right now, you can find out more about what's happening in Niger and decide how you want to get involved, by talking to your friends and family or even choosing to do more. If you want to learn how ONE partners are working to help the people of Niger, you can visit the ONE.ORG blog.

Today and tomorrow, ONE by ONE, we can join together and build a better, safer world for all.

Thank you,
The ONE Team

P.S. You can also take action today and ask 3 friends and family to join with ONE in the fight against global AIDS and extreme poverty.

Eilir raved on 08:54 Links to this post

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So let me get this straight

Jean de Menezes, the young man erroneously thought to be a terrorist who was shot to death in a London Tube station:

1. Was never identified because the officer surveilling the apartment block was relieving himself at the time.
2. Didn't run from police and in fact was unaware he was even being followed.
3. Wasn't dressed in a bulky coat that might have concealed a bomb.
4. Did not jump a ticket barrier.
5. Was already subdued before being shot.

So where did all this fiction of suspicious behaviour that we were fed directly after the fact come from? Was it deliberate misinformation, or just confusion?

This sounds like something out of a thriller. Unfortunately, it's true, and a man is dead because of a series of mistakes that were made that day. Nothing can bring him back, and my sympathy is with the family of de Menezes, who lost a loved one for no good reason. But perhaps further investigation will get to the root cause of such a substantial failure of what should be justice will be determined...and more importantly, fixed. Individuals make mistakes, but processes are usually in place that make it easier for those mistakes to happen, or can minimise them. Hospitals often take a process-over-blame approach because they recognise this. Still, I think some heads are going to roll over this one, and to be honest, they probably should.

New claims arise in Menezes death

Eilir raved on 14:35 Links to this post

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You remember when spies in movies had those miniature cameras?

We are way beyond that. This article focusses on the security risks of handhelds, iPods, and USB memory sticks to corporate America.

Palm Boulevard: News: Small Devices, Big Risks

Eilir raved on 09:31 Links to this post

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Odd but I can see it working

Library Launches Rent-a-Gay

The idea is to 'loan' out someone who is from a minority group for 45 minutes to answer questions or otherwise break down stereotypes. This is being done in Sweden. It's different, anyway....

Eilir raved on 09:31 Links to this post

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Interesting

Animals warn of human health hazards in new 'Canary Database'

(Basically they are collecting and using data on non-human animal illnesses to predict hazards to human health. Like a canary in a coal mine, illnesses such as West Nile in wild birds can harbinge illness in humans. It's an interesting idea.) Here's the actual database:

The Canary Database

Eilir raved on 08:52 Links to this post

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I wouldn't normally waste bandwidth on this...but...

BBC NEWS UK I've never read a book says Posh

Come on, really? You never had to read a book, even in school? You've never known the pleasure of immersing yourself in a story, cuddled up with a good book? How sad.

Eilir raved on 21:17 Links to this post

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A little good news

I have until Thursday to pay my rent, and I get paid Thursday. So another eviction bullet should be dodged. The landlady was very nice when I talked to her about it. Now I just need to get in touch with my new boss over at the TV station and work out a schedule with increased hours (yeah, the job I resigned from, but they wanted me to stay, and I wanted to stay, I just didn't want to let a state part-time job languish whilst waiting for the new teacher). But when I talked to his boss, she definitely wanted me to increase my hours, and since I won't be going to school, I can do just that. Yay.

Okay, I'm going to be very poor for a bit ($10 to last sixteen days)...but at least I have a roof over my head and my meds/health, and food/the health for my pets. That's what counts, right?

Eilir raved on 14:38