Things I learnt from watching TV today

1) During Carter's presidency, he was apparently attacked by a swimming killer rabbit that he had to beat off with an oar. Somehow, even though I was 13 at the time, I missed that one. Of course, this is also the man who may have reported the planet Venus as a UFO. Poor man. His presidency sucked. None of us at the time wanted to admit we liked him, even the Democrats, even though he was imminently likeable (and unlike many other Democrats, seemed to keep control over his libido). He makes a much better ex-President, I think. And yes, I believe the bunny story. I just think it was an unfortunate funny story that (pun intended) came back to bite him.

2) Florida's underground rivers can--with proper equipment and training--be explored by divers. One in particular has a nifty horizon layer between salt water and fresh water where bacteria live that then provide the basis for other lifeforms without light.

3) Anna Kournikova is not just a hot babe who's good at marketing herself, but also a very good tennis player plagued by injuries.

4) Bentleys are probably the most expensive autos to look genteely beaten up you can find on the planet. And somehow fictional inspectors with family money can run around doing investigations in one. Can you imagine Colombo in a Bentley?

5) The computer mouse was invented when I was three--1970. It looked rather like an unwieldy brick. I bet the computer geeks of the day had trouble with them going through the screens at the time. Oh, right, they had computer banks, punch cards, and those type-writer things I used my first year of college where the computer typed back on paper. Isn't it scary that this was the level of technology that put us on the moon? I mean, my old Atari had about the same amount of RAM as those NASA computers. Remember back when we were going to have moonbases (at least until the nuclear weapon stores exploded, hurtling the moon out of earth's orbit on September 13, 1999)? Yeah. And I'm still waiting for my flying car. Oh. Well. Maybe in my lifetime.

Who says TV isn't educational?

I have a cat perched on my monitor

He's been quietly squeezed in between the hutch and the monitor whilst I watch Nature and Mystery! on PBS. Darius loves having something above him, where he thinks no one can see him. When I first moved to this apartment, and I had the cats in the bathroom as we moved in the furniture, he sat under the soap dish that is attached to the wall in an effort to hide from the people who were coming in and out. Silly cat. His favourite spot to hide, though is under the aquarium. He slinks behind it and then sounds so surprised when I open the door to the cabinet and expose him to the world. :)

It's been a lovely, peaceful day, save for a thunderstorm as I was trying to catch the bus earlier. I played the game (cultists! and books! and ghouls! oh my!) and then came home and spent time with the animals watching public television. I'm thinking of going to bed a little early tonight (I stayed up until about 4 this morning, and although tomorrow's a holiday, I don't want to get too far off track in terms of sleeping.

Once work starts back on Tuesday, I'll have only four more days of my original schedule. On September 8th, I drop down to 20 hours per week, from 10 am to 2:30 pm Monday-Friday (at least I still get my lunch). Part of me is like, agh!!! Part of me's looking forward to it, at least temporarily. It's been awhile since I had such a flexible schedule. There were a couple of jobs to apply for in the classifieds today--one at my old haunt as a survey research supervisor, and one as a librarian. Ah, what fun. I guess the classifieds and I are going to become friends. And of course, I have to go next Monday and apply for unemployment. If there's any trouble with that, you'll see lots of panic on these pages, but until then, I'm trying to remain calm and just work on living life and getting a decent job I can find some stability with. And in the meantime I can use the extra time to write, to talk to the professors at school about finishing up, to work on the house, etc., etc. If I start ranting about being bored or start sounding like a slacker, please feel free to write me and tell me to get going already.

Okay, enough for now. If you're on holiday, too, happy holiday.

Hmm...I think I have a shot at this one

Honeymoon Disaster Contest

You know, the honeymoon, for all that I nearly died several times and it included the KKK and other lunatics, was much more interesting than the actual marriage. One of my co-workers insists I should write a book about my life back then (You married a gay man? Who was addicted to sex? And the guy who is still his partner was part of the wedding? What were you thinking?) Maybe I should. It's probably every mom's nightmare of what an otherwise good kid can wind up doing, although at least I didn't do drugs, get pregnant, or (miraculously) anything in terms of STDs/non-fatal or otherwise. I still have to put it down to naivete/insanity, I guess. :)

Favourite quote from a movie I haven't even seen yet...

'I'm not very good at being a dad. I have enough trouble just being me!' or something to that affect from Nicholas Cage of Matchstick Men. I think that probably resonates with every man on the planet who's taken the plunge of fatherhood. I can sympathise.

How bizarre...only in the Commonwealth

The real reasons you never hear the words 'Kentucky' anymore in terms of fried chicken, songs, etc. Urban Legends Reference Page: Lost Legends (Fried and True)

Checking in on a long weekend...

Hi again. My weekend so far has gone pretty well. There was a sleepover with movies until really late last night. Then there was Dwana's and my adventure with 'Dancing with Rottweilers' (yes, it's always an adventure). I'm not going into that, except to say that 1) my general lack of grace and a wet, slick pavement led to me yet again falling down. I'm beginning to think this blog is just a matter of filling space in between spills 2) I really admire Dwana, who has recently had surgery and who has been attacked by dogs something like four times in her life ran after a speeding dog to make sure it didn't get hurt, and 3) if you have a speeding Rottweiler bearing down on you, even if you weigh as much as I do, you cannot expect to stop it. Playing chicken with a Rottweiler is not recommended. This evening has been much more sedate; I took a nap since I forgot my CPAP machine and I never get the rest I need without it--maybe because I could stop breathing at any moment, gee sleep apnea is fun.

I've been watching VH1's 'I Love the 70s' marathon, revisiting my childhood, etc. I was 3 in 1970 and 13 by the end of the decade, so the 70s were my formative years. I think it's why I'm so peace and love and weird. Which is funny, since it was a fairly violent, dirty kind of decade. But I experienced pop culture mainly through kid's shows and folk music. I missed all the pre-AIDS sex and drugs and rock n' roll, being young and in a family that switched to country about the time music switched from anti-war anthems to long, drawn-out guitar solos that can only be the result of too much drugs. One thing about watching the show, though, is you get an interesting look at what was, and through today's commercials, what is. I saw a completely scary commercial for something I don't even remember where a woman dreams about Irish step dancing with a line of William Shatners. That's not a dream. That's a nightmare. Also, what's up with eBay's commercials to 'My Way'? Is the oeconomy so bad that the auction giant has to roll out cheesy commercials about losers who have nothing better to do than buy stuff online? It doesn't encourage me, let's put it that way.

There's a guy on the show Hal Sparks, who is also on Showtime's 'Queer as Folk', who at one point made the comment that he grew up here in Kentucky. Curious, I checked it out, and he's from Peak's Mill, which is roughly between Frankfort and Owenton (where my family lives). I could so connect with his talk of growing up where the next-door neighbour was a quarter-mile away. I grew up on Air Force bases, but whenever my father was overseas (most of the first half of the 70s, with Vietnam) I was with my family, generally in that area or down in Boyle County. Small world.

Right now, they're on 1979 and talking about Pop Rocks. I loved those things--and I remember the allure of eating them with soda and wondering if we'd explode. Hey, it was a more innocent time for dares.

Ah, the 70s. Bad clothes, bad hair. But it was a fun decade. Kids today have no idea.

Wake up calls

I know this may seem hypocritical, as I sit in air-conditioning, but...maybe it's time we rethink the wholesale dependency on power grids, non-renewable/polluting fuels, etc.

USATODAY.com - London, parts of England lose power

Of course, those of us who are concerned about the environment tend to be characterised as unrealistic tree-huggers, but really, how did we go from the 70s where oil was scarce and everyone was urged to conserve to giant SUVs in every garage?

Fun things to do with the day-glow orange groan stick you forgot in your bag

1) Terrorise dogs and cats.
2) Move your bag so it groans and no one knows why.
3) Assure that the bus driver sees you at the stop.
4) Play with it on the verge of annoying your friend and then, when she comments about how annoying they can be, shake quickly and say, yes, but did you know what a groan stick having sex sounds like? This sends the friend into great laughing. Shaking quickly freaks the cats and dogs much more than the general method.
5) Meditate on the sound rather than cursing the new bus routes/schedules which have gone into effect without any printed or online schedules as a guide and no one manning the info line to help. Bad Lextran!

See, that trip to Gattitown wasn't wasted. :)

F R I D A Y

1. Are you going to school this year?
Probably. Not this semester, but hopefully next I'll be finishing up my last year for my PhD.

2. If yes, where are you going (high school, college, etc.)? If no, when did you graduate?
University of Kentucky

3. What are/were your favorite school subjects?
History, languages, any of the social sciences, humanities, English

4. What are/were your least favorite school subjects?
Algebra. I was a geometry-kind-of-girl. Statistics for business and economics (couldn't I have worked the one for social sciences into my schedule?) Governing and binding theory (which you'd think I'd like, being linguistics, but no, it was terribly tedious).

5. Have you ever had a favorite teacher? Why was he/she a favorite?
Hmmm....of the official ones...Mr Amos at Belle Plaine once spent 45 minutes coaching me to stand on my head in gym. He was very patient with the uncoordinated brainy types. He also had a great assignment called a 'Famous Amos' test that essentially gave us a chance to do creative writing and get some extra points. Also, my long-time advisor, Dr E. Randolph Daniel for sheer staying power. And I loved George Cunha, who helped found preservation management in this country and who was this chemist-turned retired sea captain-turned conservator-turned teacher who was teaching Four-Week in his 80s. I've been pretty lucky with my teachers all together. The person who taught me the most about life, philosophy, etc., etc., however is more of a mentor than an official teacher, and I wouldn't have it any other way. :)

On the agenda...learn to tell time

In my excitement for almost Fridayness, I jumped the gun and went to the Friday Five a little early. No, I'm really not this pathetic normally. I was SOOOO tired when I came in from work that I went straight to bed, and got up at ten. Then Dwana called and we caught up on her surgery follow-up, etc. Now it's a little after eleven and I'm munching on a soy chicken pattie (with mustard) because my blood sugar's running high. It does that if I go for hours without eating, especially if I sleep. You'd think it would do the opposite, wouldn't you? Eating gets my system flushing through with insulin. So, it works that way. Ah, the things you learn about the body when you need to. I'm just glad that I don't have the issues Dwana has to learn about. The human reproductive system is both a miracle to behold and a mystery. Or, depending on your view, a strange mistake in plumbing. I mean, human cloning is on the horizon and we don't even know how the endocrine system works yet? I mildly lost sanity when I realised the vagina was corrugated. That endometriosis can cause you to bleed in strange places like the nose and knee really sent me for a loop. But I've been truly scarred ever since I learnt that the Fallopian tubes will actually cross the abdomen to catch an egg if the other is damaged. (I can't possibly reproduce the sound of my head spinning here, with a sort of wacka-wacka sound, so you'll have to supply your own).

So, how did my day go? Glad you asked. :) I have now applied for no less than four jobs. Go me! There's one in Richmond (which I think is filled--the posting went down two days after I applied), one in Morehead, one at Frankfort, and a part-time one here in Lexington. Job-hunting is exhausting, and I haven't even started the deal-with-the-unemployment-office bit yet! I was up until three in the morning last night working on one, chugging along, finished that, and then checked the time and said 'holy &^^&%%$! I have to get up in 5 hours!' I finished the not-fun-by-any-means state application today, sent it off by e-mail, and was getting ready to send a follow-up fax when I realised I'd mistyped my birthyear as 1937. Oh, yeah, add 30 years there, bub. I'm not 36--I'm 66 years old looking for work because I've been laid off, with only about a decade of library experience. Sigh. Really. I. Am. Competent. Although when I mentioned the goof to a co-worker, she was surprised they even asked for a birthdate on a job application. I think it's to prove I'm old enough to work. Hopefully they won't think I'm a doofus just because of a typo.

On the flea front, have I mentioned I hate the suckers? Oh, I know they are part of the circle of life, and I generally try not to kill living creatures, and all that, but they mostly seem to serve as population control in the form of plague-bearers. The new medicine isn't knocking them out, either. I don't know if it's just a bumper crop or if like so many other things they've become immune to our pathetic human attempts at pesticide. I think tomorrow I'm going to have to get Cerys to lay down in water until the bugs drown before taking her for a visit. It's a temporary measure, but it has a better chance of working. We're all being eaten alive. The fish may have to be sacrificed for the greater good (if I flea bomb the house), although if I do that I'll do my best to cover the aquarium vents up. Also, it is way to hot to move the animals out to the non-functioning car for a couple of hours. Sigh. I wonder if I could rig things so we could sit out on the porch and no one gets away for a couple of hours. We'd probably just bring more of the fleas inside. :( That brings out all sorts of other things, since eating fleas can cause the animals to get worms. At least I have wormer if they pick those up. I still remember asking a vet if I could pick up worms--you get mostly immune to the idea of dealing with gross stuff when you have pets, but worms are right out in my book-- and she was, like, well, only if you eat the fleas.

:)

Do you ever wonder why I have to approach my life with humour? The only other option is to go bonkers.

Well, I need to do a little Internet research. I'll pop back after midnight. :)

Thought for the day...

Top ten reasons to close the cap on the mustard.

Oh. Doh. You really only need one.

Thank goodness for glasses. They've kept both mustard and flea guts out of my eyes today. Gag.

This, however, is from my odd news pile

I would so sue--and I'm not into litigation as a general rule. But considering some men might just shoot someone over this, I guess lawsuits are preferable.

Yahoo! News - Texas Man Wakes Up After Operation, Penis Missing

This baby's already had a rough time...hope this helps

And no, this isn't from my odd news source...it's straight-up health news. I can relate, though. My friends for years teased me that my twin was probably trapped in my body somewhere, rather than miscarried. Creepy.

Yahoo! News - Chinese Doctors Remove Baby's Parasitic Third Leg

Attempting to make life safer...but it's a long road ahead

Yahoo! News - Bangladesh Laws No Shield Against Acid Attacks

You know, I wouldn't even know where to get acid, except maybe a car battery. I guess this is an argument that even without guns people will commit brutal acts, but still, why is this so popular a form of attack in this culture? I've seen Indian Dalits ('Untouchables') who had also been attacked. What goes through someone's mind that they go, oh, I think I'll throw acid on someone? And in the case of some of the cases that are not pre-meditated, where does the acid come from? And no, I'm not being sarcastic, I'm just a little insulated, I guess, and I don't understand why and how this happens.

Will the real blackout please stand up?

Many of you probably got an image in your mailboxes purporting to be a satellite photo of the Great Northeast Blackout of 2003. but it's obviously a fake, as it is too dark, like someone just ran over the are with a black paintbrush. For more on this urban legend, along with the real satellite images, try the Museum of Hoaxes site. You can also see the real images (dramatic, but not that dramatic), at: Great Northeast Power Blackout of 2003 or Images from the NOAA.

By the way, if you'd like to see the image from which the hoax was derived, plus a nifty accompanying story on the distribution of city lights on the Earth, go to NASA's Earth Observatory page.

Want to give input on balancing a library career and family for an upcoming book?

Balance Survey

ALA responds to CIPA concerns

ALA | A statement from ALA President Carla Hayden

Interested in information therapy?

Information Therapy Home

It's a shame, don't you think, that our government is in some ways as much a danger to our way of life as the terrorists?

Mr. Ashcroft's Foot Soldiers (washingtonpost.com)

Aaaaaaggggghhhhhh!

That pretty much sums up how I feel at the moment. I'm coming down from being on the verge of a panic attack, and I'm frustrated with myself to boot because of it, even though I know it's probably a brain chemistry or neural thing, I still feel like somehow I'm just defective. It's like my brain glitched and suddenly I could not tolerate sounds or light or people or any of the relatively normal things around me. I have problems with integrating my senses sometimes. If a TV is on in one room and someone's talking and there's sound in another I have a really hard time picking out just that person's speech and paying attention. Add, say, a radio in the other room and it blows my concentration all to hell.

Today I think I was already a little oversensitive. The nursing students were loudly twittering in that gossipy way that young women do when I came in, discussing their teachers and who was married, and who was not. Still, I got a lot of work done. I didn't really have much trouble until I went to lunch, where everything started to irritate me. One man kept circling around me like a fly being super-careful to keep his space in line whilst filling his salad plate, etc., then waiting impatiently as I fixed a sandwich (I had to tell him to go around me). When I sat down the room was cold (whose idea was it to lock the thermostat at 59 degrees??!) and crowded but we were okay at our table. But more and more people kept coming. One girl had to move her things because a patient had an accident right next to her, and as she was cleaning up someone sat down and moved her chair right into it. Someone else burst out really loudly right behind me as she tried to grab someone's attention. I took my tray up to make room and someone else sat down in my seat even though Dwana told him I was sitting there. Suddenly instead of four or five people at a table we were eight or nine, and I was starting to feel panicky and claustrophobic and agoraphobic and whatever else. So I excused myself and Dwana did too, and we went to her office for just a bit and someone fired up a floor cleaner at full throttle. I came back to my office, turned the lights out over my desk and in the family resource room, and just sat in quiet for a few minutes, and I started to feel better. But although I didn't totally go to pieces, I feel like it inside. Crazy? No, just a little unwell. :)

Dwana checked up on me a little later and I was feeling better. My heart rate's back to normal now, at least. Call it social anxiety, sesory integration dysfunction, whatever, it sucks. Fortunately I'm usually better at tolerating distress than that.

I think part of the problem, too was that I felt sort of cast aside at lunch, emotionally, with my place being taken, and I sort of feel that way about work in general. And I really, really am tired of people asking how the reduction in hours is going when it doesn't even happen for another week and a half. Although I'm glad they care, I also know they just don't understand that I can't just make those hours up with another part-time job easily, at least that will pay equally, so I probably will be leaving. And although I realise it might be a very good thing to go through the change, it's not easy, and at the same time, I don't want to seem like there's no problem, because the whole situation really does rather suck.

Argh.

Enough of this. I'm tired of feeling sucky. At least writing about it does help. And Dwana, at least, understands. At least we'll still be working about the same time, and even if I have to find another job, we'll still see each other. :)

From the odd news bag...

Yahoo! News - Sometimes Even an Orangutan Needs a Hug
Ah, simian love.

Woman's 13-Day Krispy Kreme Vigil Ends
Don't get the appeal of Krispy Kreme? Well, she does have an autistic son who is obsessed with them. I'd be camping out, too, if it would make him happy. Still...I think they put something addictive in them.

Whew...

After work Dwana and I ran some errands and went out to eat at Gattitown. I've never been there--or any similar pizza and arcade sort of place. I played skeeball (sp?) for the first time. I particularly loved the coconut pizza. The games were fun, although I didn't have much luck with them. But Dwana rocked at a couple. I did get a moaning stick, though, along with a butterfly pen/notebook and some nifty stickers and tootsie rolls. Thanks, Dwana! :) Then we went hunting for a birthday gift, which thankfully met success and headed to Petsmart for something that might knock the fleas in the house dead. I was on PetMeds.com earlier and Frontline/Advantage didn't really seem much cheaper than at the vet's. I compared those with BioSpot and it seemed to cover more. Hopefully, it will work better than the Hartz, which didn't faze the things. This stuff also works against ticks (not a problem) and mosquitoes (sometimes a problem, with a reservoir and stream nearby). Of course, now I'm the only mammal in the house who doesn't have pesticide on me. I'm thinking I may bring out the natural bug repellent I have tonight.

Dwana and I had a really good time, although we were out for about four hours and very tired by the time it was all over. We also kept running into construction, renewed UK traffic, accident scenes, etc. At Gattitown they were showing Cats and Dogs. I love that movie. Dwana hadn't seen it all, and of course we didn't sit there and eat for two hours. So that's a definite possibility for a movie night. We also hunted down the family of a beautiful calico kitten that was running lose and reunited her with her family. That was fun (and removed the temptation for either of us to keep it, given that neither of us has room for another cat.

Well, my cats and dog are pining for attention, so I think I'll go ahead and close. 'Night.

Started my day off with a bit of a tear jerker...

But hopefully one with a happy ending. I was reading the Wall Street Journal about a man who built a research company to try to find a cure for two of his children who suffer from Pompe's Disease. Over the years he's gotten investors, created a company, and then sold it to a larger one and run their Pompe programme with the hope of getting the medicine, an enzyme, produced faster. In order to get the medicine through trials quickest, he had to sign off an order that would set up trials, but for groups too young to include his own children. Attempts to set up trials where they could be included were hampered by his position with the company, so he left to spend more time with his family. Now, the children are in a trial and, although responding differently from the medicine, there's hopeful signs of improvement. I won't link to the Journal article, because it's only available to subscribers...but if you want part of the story, check out: KRT Wire | 03/12/2003 | In race against time, dad works to find cure. It shows what committed families can do, given networking and drive. And granted, you could argue that not every parent has a background in finance or is a Harvard alum--but getting the word out and sheer stubborness counts for a lot, I think.

PS

I'm including a new link under the Kentucky Blogs on my blogroll. Seems Dwana's friend Aaron has entered the world of blogging. Be sure to check out This Space for Rent.

Oh, and despite our differences, I still read Zabet's blog. (Sorry, there's no permalink to link to, and I don't want to link straight to the picture. It's 8/25/03, under 'refurbished'). What can I say? It's ingrained in me to keep up with people from my past. I still keep occasional tabs on my father (whom I haven't spoken to in 10 years) and my ex (ditto for about 12 years). It's not obsession, more like, knowing where all your Legos (TM) are, you know? Like, okay, I took the red one out of the building, where did it go? Anyway, I was somewhat shocked to see that Patrick shaved off all of his beautiful hair. Granted, I figured he might, since he's job hunting, but still...wow. The man had hair women would kill for. There are some women who might mourn that hair. Still, I guess whatever works for him is what matters. :) Still, he was one of the few guys I've seen who could wear long hair successfully and not look like it was a reaction to balding or trying to look like a rocker.

Sorry I haven't been posting...

By now you should know I had a big weekend followed by the requisite crash last night, right? But I'm up now and my blood sugar's all funky from sleeping so long, but it's coming back to normal, so I should be somewhat coherent.

Hmmm...Saturday I visited with my family in Danville. Everyone's doing pretty well, although my grandmother looks a little frailer each time I go home, and that's upsetting. My mom had worked the night before but she wasn't super tired and seemed much healthier and happier. She was so excited about my coming home that she forgot to clock out and had to go back, then forgot to make a delivery on her way home and had to go back for that. :) We don't see each other terribly often (about every 2-3 months) but we're pretty close--not so much as when I was young but healthier, you know? Now we're two independent adults with our own lives, where it used to be we were very enmeshed, followed by a time in my 20s where we barely saw each other. I'm glad to see her happy, and I'm happy to have the relationship we have now. We've been through a lot together, after all.

I love my stepdad, John, by the way. I think that he's part of my mom's happiness, for one. He's got all the good points of my own father (such as 20 years in the Air Force--so we all connect through that and the techie-geekness) but none of the bullshit. Well, a little, but it's not the same. It doesn't belittle, for one, and it's honestly funny. :) We were talking about the new Kentucky licence plates (it's time for my mom to get hers) on the way home and John and I definitely hate it. It looks like this:



It was created as a partnership between the Transportation and Tourism Cabinets. You can check out the info sheet and the governor's office announcement if you're interested. Suffice to say, though, many Kentuckians (and John and I are two!) hate the thing. To me, it looks like it belongs on a cereal box, or maybe in Who Framed Roger Rabbit? when they drive off into the sunset in Toon Town. Apparently there's been a huge increase in people getting alternative plates, like the environmental ones, or ones with horses on them, etc. Granted, I'm glad that if my car were working, I wouldn't have to get one--I had one that supported victims of child abuse, and although it also has a smiley sun on it, it's a crayon drawing that's meant to look like a four-year-old did it, rather than some slick professional advertising billboard. One friend couldn't figure out why they didn't just have a contest for a design with that theme--it's not like we don't have plenty of great artists in the Commonwealth, after all. John had an explanation. He thinks it all goes back to the Transportation Cabinet's computer systems, which were recently hacked and were used for all sorts of porn-related stuff. He thinks this plate was some hacker's joke, and that the state didn't realise it until the announcement was made and decided to go with it. He also suggested that we be issued plain white plates and then given stickers to 'create our own'--sort of like Colorforms (TM). That way my mom, who likes the new plate (she says it's because she's an optimist) can still have her 'insipid smiley sun' and the rest of us can have what we want. Sounds reasonable, I think.

Here's one outsider's take on the plate. Just want the rest of you to know a lot of us agree, and can't figure out what our government was thinking.

The visit home was good. My grandmother's dog tried to steal the show, as always. My mom and I went out and trimmed some bushes and filled up the garbage pails and put them on the kerb. I discovered blank looks when I referred to it as a 'herbie'. See, in Lexington, we have 'Herbie the Kerbie' which is our regular big green container, 'Rosie' which is a smaller blue recycling centre, and 'Lenny' which is for yard waste (as in 'lend a hand'). There's nothing like people looking at you blankly and you're talking and suddenly the words 'I guess...you don't name...your garbage cans here?' comes out of your mouth. Okay, maybe the licence plate is appropriate, after all. But it's bad when you hit a cultural gap with your own family by travelling 35 miles. :)

After the visit I went over for a special game session--a solo adventure where I did not cover myself in glory but at least managed to dispel the giant tentacles that had demolished a house after some ex-frat boys decided to play with a book, masques of various Mythos creatures, and bottles of wine with winged cephalapods in them. Ah, Cthulhu. What other game gives you this sort of fun? My character did go slightly loopy at one point (fortunately after getting everyone out safely) and spend seven rounds screaming 'I told you it was real! I told you it wasn't fun like D&D. But no, you wouldn't listen!' The next day Brenda and I were treated to some down time. One character, who is pregnant, is now engaged and trying to plan a very quick wedding that will satisfy her parents and the team's secretary (a force to be reckoned with in her own right--after all, she's not human, but a technocratic construct who thinks she's human) and just hoping yet another Apocalypse can hold off until after the honeymoon (to be spent in the Florida Everglades. The groom is Australian, and it was his idea. I suspect we'll find some sort of alligator cult to fight there.) The game is so Buffyesque sometimes. Oh, and we found out that we made a small oops that changed the timestream when we went back to the Salem witch trials to save on of our own. Apparently we were a little too flashy and the girls and Tituba, whom we'd inhabited, were then seen as having divinely-inspired gifts for witchfinding. So they've been hanging people and still do at Boston Commons. Oops. (I'm catching a lot of flack, being a historian, of course). So we need to fix it. It's rather ironic, though, since the five people involved trained as witches to get a witch back before she could be hanged as a witch in the past. (And oh, if you're wondering why there's no witchburning, that's because witches in this country were hanged, not burnt, silly. I hate it when TV shows make that mistake. Although I know of one incident in Kentucky history where it was attempted).

Yesterday I continued my job search. I've got an application into EKU. The state job a librarian had told me about was finally posted yesterday, so I'm working on my application there. That requires (typically) much paperwork. Gee. I hope no one holds my licence plate rant against me. :) The librarian had told me not to laugh when I saw the pay, but it's between $200 and $800 more per month than I make now. No laughing, trust me.

I'm getting a little more nervous about the lay-off. T-13 days and counting. I hope the unemployment kicks in without too much trouble. Sigh. In the meantime, it should be easier to get things in as they come up--I have a good cover letter that I can make small changes to, and that's the part I hate the most--even more than the interview. And, Dwana has offered to help me get to interviews outside of Lexington. If I get a job, I can get a car, but until then.... At least initially I should have more time for writing. I also plan to attack my study (with whip in hand)! And, I'm going to spend this semester talking to the folks in history to see about going ahead and finishing my phD, now that my health's back on track. I'm only a year or year-and-a-half away, after all. I can get a reading list together and start studying for qualifyings, too, even if I'm not officially back in school. So, I won't be bored. :)

Well, I've blogged enough for one morning, I think. My hands are falling asleep and I need some caffeine. Take care.

Mars Attacks!

For all the best news and tips for viewing Mars as it makes its closest swing-by in, oh, 60,000 years, check out Space.com. And for a really fun rundown on the differences between Mars and Earth, check out: Earth vs. Mars: The Two Planets Weigh In.

This is great. Now here's a candidate I can get behind (tongue firmly planted in cheek)

King Arthur Announces Bid for White House

Although I accept the artist's desire to make sure people never forget...

T-shirts and magnets depicting images from Auschwitz just seem so wrong. After all, we usually buy these items to show our agreement with a slogan or glorify an interest. If you have a T-shirt that says 'Arbeit Macht Frei', that sends the message (to most people viewing it) that you agree with the slogan. It seems to be more something a neo-Nazi would wear rather than someone concerned with genocide. There are things that could be done to make the statement clearer--adding something like 'never again', for example or depicting artwork of children of the Holocaust, etc. Decide for yourself. Check it out at: Yahoo! News - Auschwitz 'Souvenirs' Spark Controversy

CALL FOR REVIEWS

TRANSFORMATIONS: THE JOURNAL OF INCLUSIVE SCHOLARSHIP AND PEDAGOGY

DEADLINE: October 1, 2003

The editors of Transformations are seeking review essays (books, film, video, performance, art, music, etc.) for our spring 2004 issue. Review essays should examine resources for teaching a specific subject. The author should describe the various resources (books, film, video, performance, art, music) and offer a rationale for the usefulness and application of the resources. The review may focus on one medium (e.g., movies) or several (e.g., movies, websites, novels, and paintings).

Send submissions (3,000 8,000 words) and inquiries to: Jacqueline Ellis and Edvige Giunta, Editors. For submission guidelines contact the editors. Transformations explores and promotes inclusive pedagogy and curriculum transformation. Representing a variety of cross-disciplinary interests, both theoretical and practical, the journal is designed to create a dynamic exchange among diverse scholars. A variety of approaches, everything from theoretical essays to short descriptions of pedagogical innovations, will assist teachers and scholars at all levels who are committed to integrating recent scholarship on gender, race, ethnicity, class, sexuality, and other identity positions.

Bonding through hair

I have never gone with anyone else to have my hair done. My hair has been getting quite long *yay* but that means it's likely to turn into my 70s geekazoid hanging limply natural do. So I had been thinking of getting some layers put in around Halloween. But with the job search on, I moved up my plans. Dwana was going to get her hair cut today, so I tagged along. It was a lot of fun. I'm not a particularly girly girl, but apparently I do enjoy doing girly girl things with a friend occasionally. I really love what they did to her hair--she's got a lot of natural curl. It's funny, our hair is almost exactly the same in terms of colour, texture, and sheer stubborness, although mine's more wavy than curly. I got a lot of layers put in with the back still pretty long (they didn't take more than a half-inch or so) but then soft layers going all the way up to my chin. I can still put it up if it's hot but it's got some life. (I have baby fine hair. It's a challenge. Especially when your body type is, well, big and fairly butch.) It can be flipped down for a professional look and up for a softer, fun look. :) At the moment, it looks a little beaten (it always does when it's first cut) so I'm interested to see what happens when I wash it tomorrow. And since it is a very different look for me, it was nice to have someone other than the person who came at me with the scissors reassuring me that it looked great).

What's next, a slumber party where we do our nails? :) I guess those years of reading Seventeen magazine counted for something.

Reason why you're meant to be friends #45483

You're working on a project and Bette Midler's 'The Rose' comes on the radio and you both stop in your tracks and sing along with every ounce of your beings.

:)

-and-

Reason #45484

You're in the car at a stoplight and you see a guy driving a small steamroller down the sidewalk with a racecar shirt that says 'Asphalt Attack' and both collapse in giggles.

A preservation librarian's nightmare

LISNews.com | Tabloid archive to be destroyed

Okay, so it's a giant collection of the weird and smutty. But it's a valuable collection. And it points to a preservation librarian's nightmare: preserving collections in an era of bioterrorism.

I was very fortunate to have the late, great George Cunha as my conservation/preservation management teacher. He had a solution to damn near anything that could be thrown at a library collection. A chemist, career naval officer, and ground-breaking conservator in his 80s who looked a little like Burl Ives and whose lectures were like a combination of a sea captain's tales by the fireside and Mr Wizard, I could just imagine him bringing in reams of photocopies on proper techniques for dealing with anthrax-exposed collections.

Mr Cunha, we could use you back.

I think most people have no idea how incredibly complicated public libraries can be

And, thankfully, I don't know that firsthand, having been a medical librarian with internships in academic and government libraries or working for private companies. Although I love the idea of public librarianship, and I wouldn't mind working in one, I'd absolutely hate to have to direct one, simply because of the issues in balancing state, local, and library board concerns, endemic budget shortfalls, etc., etc. Oh, and for almost no pay, especially in a small town.

LISNews.com | TN County kills library funding

It sounds to me that there a lot of issues in this story. Why was a security system vital in a bad budget year and bought from operations funding rather than as a capital expenditure? How could things get to a point where by cutting funding the state could literally come take away the books?

It's so easy to cut funding, shut down a library, reduce hours, etc. But once you actually get to a point where positions are cut, facilities are closed, or materials are shuttled away, it costs WAY more to try to get that all back later. It's like the business adage of retention = savings because it costs a lot more to train a new employee than to keep an experienced one. I know I'm not the biggest financial or business genius, but I grokked that pretty easily from my management courses and it's certainly has proved true in real life. So why do they do this? I remember the last recession (lucky me, when I graduated from library school) and California was shutting libraries down right and left. Now we see it all over the country. You can't ever get back what you lose. Don't they know that? It's never the same, and it takes years and years to build up the necessary programmes and patron confidence again.

And yet, as in this case, I can't just blame the politicians. It sounds like there's a breakdown somewhere in management, too, whether at the county level or the library level. It's like watching a pileup on the Interstate--lots of things interact to create a disaster, and if you had to try to determine what the one trigger that could have prevented it could be and stop it in time, it would be very hard to do.

Grrr....

Finally time for the REAL Friday Five

1. When was the last time you laughed? Earlier today, talking to Dwana over dinner.

2. Who was the last person you had an argument with? A friend. But it was a philosophical one, not personal.

3. Who was the last person you emailed? A client who needed a reference for a diagramme.

4. When was the last time you bathed? This morning, before I went to work.

5. What was the last thing you ate? A couple of slices of Stuffed Crust (TM) Veggie Lover's Pizza from Pizza Hut and cheesy garlic bread. Very good. Very filling. I had to save the rest for lunch tomorrow. Thank goodness we split a pizza.

Apparently we weren't that far from being part of the Blackout of 2003

We were just 2 cities away from the cascade.

...which was all brought to home a little while ago when the power went off. Apparently various places around New Circle Road and even in Harrodsburg (a city a couple of counties away) were out, but people near UK were alright. It only lasted a few minutes. I've been through three during work hours and about six total since I moved to this section of town, between ice storms and local tranformer issues, so I just grabbed my flashlight and continued as normal. Still, I have windows in the library. I feel sorry for the lady who was in the bathroom when it happened. :)

Today so far

What I'm listening to at work: Gaelic Voices (at the moment Niamh Parsons' 'Fear a Bhata'.
Good things of the day so far: 1. Payday. 2. Getting a lift from Dwana as I was coming in. Today's Unshelved warmed the cockles of my little Trekker (not Trekkie) heart. I love hortas!!!
Plans: Now that I've gotten my catalogue and interlibrary loan tracking databases on my handheld, I need to do a requisition for the actual program. (DataViz' SmartList to Go--highly recommend this; it has a lot of easy plug-ins, including for barcode tracking. :) Also have a request for an article we're lacking. Later, I need to go to the credit union. I'm considering taking off tomorrow and giving the house a good cleaning tomorrow. It's driving me crazy, and my mom is coming up on Saturday. Granted, she knows I'm a slob, but I'm also a slob bothered by messiness. Go figure...

Oh, I forgot to write last night about three nifty things. Yesterday morning I heard/watched a woodpecker (relatively quiet one, actually) going after some insects in some of the deadwood left from our ice storm. Lots of other little birds were ready to pounce at anything it left. I love the variety of wildlife we get in my little pocket of Lexington, because of the reservoir and woods.

Also, we went to Rincon Mexicano to celebrate a co-worker's birthday (she wanted a good margarita). I hadn't eaten there in awhile. Very yummy, and only mild tummy trouble afterwards (thank goodness for Tums).

Also, I got my Archaeology magazine and it shows, proof positive, that British pagans can be just as batty as their American counterparts. A guy who thinks he's Arthur Pendragon? Shakes head. I sometimes feel like I shouldn't even tell people I'm pagan. Most people don't draw a distinction between things like neo-Pagan vs. Pagan or Wiccan vs. Witch (and no, they're really not the same things) and I'm just one of those in the minority who tend to ground my beliefs in traditions and what we do know of ancient practices, rather than making it up as I go along. I'm not so hidebound that I don't see room for innovation, but still, I guess I'm just a fundamentalist. And no, I wouldn't be dancing on top of the stones at Stonehenge (the article is on trying to strike a balance between sites as sacred spaces and archaeological treasures). I care too much about the integrity of the site for that. I also think it's generally a bad idea to be in the centre of a monolith during a holiday with lots of gyrating people feeding it chaotically--since yes, I do believe in magic, and yes, I do believe the sites are sacred, and I do believe it's real, rather than an excuse to play dress up and party. But that's just me. I'm a pagan stick-in-the-mud, I guess.

That's all for now. I've passed on worthwhile stuff from my e-mail, and taken a small break, and now it's time to tackle that requisition so that I can then tackle database manipulation for the Palm OS.

Let me tell you, I love the SmartList to Go. It's much easier than some of the others I've tried in terms of using a barcode module in the Handspring Visor. I now have all my books at my fingertips, and I've got another database for tracking in ILL orders, receipt, and delivery, again using the barcode. Much better than writing all of that done, or worse, just collecting files upon files of requests with no ready access to the statistics. I love being a handheld librarian. :)

"Surviving: A Cancer Patient Magazine," going electronic only

From: "Stanford Report," August 20, 2003

"The magazine, edited by Fobair with help from Weisberg, members of the department of radiology oncology and volunteers, includes essay on coping with cancer diagnosis, treatment, and changes in relationships with family, friends and doctors. It also features poems and other articles. The magazine just celebrated a bittersweet 20-year anniversary, which marks the end of its life in print. Lack of donations is forcing the group to publish exclusively online."
Full story

Need to do fundraising?

The Community Matching Grant Program allows local nonprofits to hold a fundraiser at a local Wal-Mart or SAM'S CLUB; Wal-Mart and SAM'S can then elect to match a portion of the funds raised, up to $1,000! Events held off the premises of a Wal-Mart store or SAM'S CLUB are also eligible for funding, when a Wal-Mart or SAM'S CLUB associate is actively involved in the event.

If your organisation is planning a fundraiser that you think could be held outside a store, contact the Community Involvement Coordinator at the location closest to you. Follow this link for a "Wal-mart store locator" for your local contact information. Grant applications are available at your local store. For more details you can visit their website.

Thinking of doing research into library/information services in health care?

Apply now for 2004 MLA Research, Development and Demonstration Project Grants:

If you need support for research, development and demonstration projects that help promote excellence in the field of health sciences librarianship and information science, apply for this award. These grants will not be given to an activity that is operational in nature or has only local usefulness. Grants range from $100 to $1000.

A completed application form must be submitted by November 1, 2003.

For further information on eligibility and an application form please visit this site.

More ambitious? Want $25,000 instead? Check out the same page for the Donald A. B. Lindberg Fellowship, which has a deadline of November 15th. :)

Isn't Anna Nicole single now?

Yahoo! News - Man, 102, Seeks Wife for Good Times

Of course, a 102-year-old gun-toting husband might not be the best thing. It would be bad to be mistaken for a clay pigeon.

I'm just happy 'Muggle' made it into the OED :)

Isn't that just a great dream to have as a writer? To coin a term that makes it into the premier dictionary for the language?

Yahoo! News - Bada Bing! It's in the Dictionary

Flaming Phones, Batman!

Yahoo! News - Woman Hurt as Cellphone Bursts Into Flames

Today's fortune cookie

Courtesy of Bangkok House...

'The philosophy of one century is the common sense of the next.'

My not-quite-Friday Five (I made these up myself)

In honour of the approaching end of summer (or eventual beginning, if you're Down Under), here goes:

1) What is your favourite sound of summer? The cacophony of cicadas on a hazy summer morning. The myriad sounds echo from all around, making me drowsy and homesick for my childhood in Louisiana.

2) Sight? The elusive, glorious, periwinkle stubborness of a chicory flower that springs up despite mowing but cannot survive being cut for an indoor bouquet, with fluttering butterflies tumbling around.

3) Smell? The smell of rich garden loam after a good soaking rain mixed with the scent of early wild jessamine (clematis).

4) Taste? The juicy, messy, acidic bite of a fully-ripe, vine-grown-in-the-backyard tomato.

5) Touch? The supportive embrace of the sun-warmed water against me as I float lazily along.

I came up with this a few days ago...

What do I want in my life?

• To learn
  
• To be secure but not ostentatious (in my standard of living)
  
• To have good friendships
  
• To explore spirituality
  
• To explore creativity
  
• To be healthy (mind, soul, body)
  

How can I go about achieving these?

• To take every opportunity--reading, classes, and experience--to learn
  
• To find a job adequate to support me, my animals, a small house, and savings in a sustainable, relatively simple lifestyle that is kind to earth and society
  
• To foster my current friendships and keep working on my social skills
  
• Learn, practise, read whatever I can to get in touch with my faith; rekindle daily meditations
  
• Write, draw, sculpt, perhaps take a class here and there and continue to play in our weekly game
  
• Exercise and diet in moderation, take my medicine, see a doctor regularly, foster my mental health, and face the reality of my diabetes and its implications.
  

Not bad, really--and except for the security, I'm doing pretty well. These are the things most important to me. What is important to you?

Finally!!!

When I moved to the new Blogger I wound up having a template issue and published with one of the samples provided by that system. Everything I've changed has been built on that, and it contained a really annoying but in the CSS where Internet Explorer would expand the right-side column, sometimes wrapping under the floated left-side column, along with a tendency to not display the postings beyond what could be displayed alongside the right-side column. The only way to read on was to hit view...text size...and then any of the sizes. But now, thanks to the folks at Position is Everything, a site devoted to CSS, its bugs, and how to fix them, it should display as I've always intended it to. I've also shortened the display so the last three days are displayed before you have to go looking at archives. Hope this helps the readability. And, yeah, I know I just technobabbled, but suffice to say, it's (hopefully) fixed, at least until the next bug shows up. And it was fairly painless. Good night. :)

Blog! Damn you!

For whatever reason, I just don't seem to be writing much lately. Sorry for that. Instead my blog has become this sort of surreal drive-by of news and quizzes. Last week I was a little slackerish anyway...I didn't go to the gym (but then, I was pretty sore from my dog encounter and probably shouldn't have forced it anyway). And I guess things were still sinking in about the whole job issue.

But as, they say, tomorrow is another day, or a next week is another week, I suppose. I feel much better. I'm trying to figure out how to restructure my services to a 4-hour day. And in the meantime, I'm job-seeking, checking with the unemployment office, exploring the possibility of classes, etc. Yesterday I got word that the state job was approved to be posted, although it's still not showing up when I look on the listings. But soon, very soon. I checked with unemployment and so long as I'm looking for full-time work, it shouldn't matter that I'm in school (i.e., I won't screw up my benefits by taking a class or two). Realistically, I think there's no way in hell to go this semester, but maybe in the spring). To wit, I e-mailed the director of the linguistics programme at school. Figured as long as I was tying up loose ends I'd check on a maddenly elusive class I never seemed to be able to fit into my schedule, either undergraduate or graduate. That is LIN 515, phonological analysis. It's only taught during the day, which made it hard to work and fit it in, and unlike my governance and binding class (grammar, not political science, although I know, it sounds like it), I couldn't take it independent study because you have to be able to analyse sounds in class. This class is the only thing I need for my fourth (fifth? I never can tell whether they considered Honours (read Humanities) as a major or not) undergraduate major. I know. Do you need another major? No. But it's the principle of the thing. One class! Argh! Anyway, I asked the director if there was a chance it would be taught in spring. Here's hoping.

Along the way I noticed (not that I plan on pursuing this, but it made me happy) that they've added an Indian Studies programme, with Sanskrit (the one language I studied that I loved but found most challenging and has enough unique nasals to spin my head) as a basic requirement. Yipee! Glad to see Dr Stump will be teaching Sanskrit regularly. Maybe one of these days I'll actually take the whole thing. That and Greek past the aorist. *Hangs head* Yes, I know...it's my dark secret. I am a dabbler in ancient languages without true mastery over any. Well. Actually, I'm pretty good at Latin, although I need to practise my oral skills.

I also went back to the gym today. Saw one of my coworkers there. She's doing the personal-trainer-of-doom option. I probably should have kept my workout fairly short since I hadn't gone in a week, but I got there earlier than normal and I didn't want to take the bus back during Yu-Yu Hakusho. So, I walked for about 15 minutes to warm up, cycled under the random setting (aptly named--you never know when it'll suddenly get harder) for 25 minutes (through Cyber 009), and then went back to the treadmill and walked at a slower, but longer programme during Yu-Yu Hakusho. I wonder if anyone else works out to the Cartoon Network? My knees felt a little weird afterwards. I wish I'd remembered to bring my swimsuit; I could have gone into the hot tub. Still, I had fun and hopefully I won't be too sore tomorrow. Then I came on home, after a small detour (the bus as it was leaving the transit centre, got called back to pick up two more passengers who were coming in on a late bus, so we swung around the corner and came back in). Don't get me wrong, I really do appreciate the hard work the drivers and others put in so I can get around town. But if I ever won the lottery, one thing I would do is put someone in charge (and pay them/endow the bus system) with the money needed to have buses covering all major parts of this town, running every 15 minutes during the week, and every half-hour during the weekend. Does anyone else out there have a bus system that runs hourly? It's not like Lexington's incredibly big, either. If you've never depended on public transportation to get you anywhere, you may not understand. But I know I'd probably not bother riding if I were elderly or handicapped (two groups that make up a large percentage of the ridership)--it's just too hard to use and if you can't walk very far it's even harder to reliably get anywhere. Oh, and our cab system is way worse. I've known people who wait for 2 hours on a busy day for a cab. Back when I was a cashier at a grocery I used to take a little old lady home if I were getting off when she was there because it cost her something like $8 just to go three blocks, and three hours to do her grocery shopping because of the wait. It's funny how some people will give you a ride, no questions asked, and others will ask where you're going and can't be bothered to go a couple of blocks out of their way. One thing I figured out a long time ago--unless traffic is gridlocked, you're late for an appointment, or you're running on gas fumes, you can transverse this town in about about a half hour and no place within the city limits is really too far out of the way. As I told the lady when she tried to pay me the cabfare, I'd be driving anyway and didn't have to be anywhere at a specific time, I might as well give her a lift. But if you're relying on Lexington's cabs or buses to get you somewhere, a quick trip that takes everyone else about 20 minutes could take up the better part of the afternoon. And like the people who had to make do last week without all of our electric-powered conveniences, sometimes it's important to get a little perspective on what we take for granted. I know spending years without a reliable car I could take outside of the city has certainly given me that perspective. And although I have to admit I'd prefer the convenience and freedom of a car (especially to take on trips), I'm kind of glad I'm not contributing to the SUV-laden 'bigger is better' mentality out there on the road that'll only serve to put more strain on our natural resources. (And even if I did manage to get a car, I'd try to go for the many mpg and gee, if money were no limit, let's go for a hybrid). :)

Okay, I'm confusing writing with babbling. I should go to sleep and leave you alone. Dwana, if you're out there, hope you're feeling better and I see you at work tomorrow. And thanks, Tracy, for the layoff condolences. May NASA (or at least your slice of it) never fear for funding. (Yeah, I figured that'd get a laugh). :)

Ah. Gives a whole new meaning to 'living off the grid'--if you're still connected, you can actually sell power to the companies.

:)

Yahoo! News - N.Y. Woman Sends Her Power to State Grid

Sad. I just can't understand why people do this.

Yahoo! News - 'Suicide' Truck Bomb Hits Baghdad UN, Kills Envoy

I actually got the news of Mr de Mello's death not from the standard news sources but from Salam Pax.

Here's a smile forward for the morning

11 PEOPLE ON A ROPE

Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave, because otherwise they were all going to fall.

They weren't able to name that person, until the woman gave a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because, as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, or for men in general, and was used to always making sacrifices with little in return. As soon as she finished her speech,all the men started clapping their hands.......

SEND THIS MAIL TO AN INTELLIGENT WOMAN, SO THAT SHE HAS SOMETHING TO SMILE ABOUT TODAY.

A quiz before sleeping...

Which ``Fairly Odd Parents`` character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Today was nice...

I was up early this morning so I watched one of my favourite Buffy episodes--'The Wish' where Cordelia wishes Buffy never showed up in Sunnydale and all hell breaks loose. I love watching Willow be bad, although I like good Willow better. And, it's the first appearance of Anya. Grrr! Argh! No Buffy this season!

*Spoiler Warning*

No Anya ever again! While the story possibilities for a spin-off are now virtually endless, there can be no movie or other reunion of the whole 'Scoobie' gang, because some of them are dead, or worse, ash. Waaaahhhhh!!!!

*Spoiler Off*

It was a nice transition from yesterday's Cthulhu game, where our intrepid guardians explored a series of tunnels under a Maine bed-and-breakfast that were chock full of Rat People, unholy flautists, strange idols, and a Great Old One, all of which we managed to take care of, but with the minor hitches of my character beginning to turn into a Rat Thing and both of us contracting bubonic plague. (I survived bubonic plague and all I got was a dumb old T-shirt). Oh, and Brenda's character finally got to use a spell to drown a minion of the Wyrm as a sacrifice to the Bunyip (she has to do that once a year)--which helps take Brenda's mind off of the fact that her 16-year-old just tanked her Internet connexion ('I know what I'm doing!' so she can't get feedback on her Lord of the Rings stories and just got his driver's licence. Is it any wonder we play the game?

Turning from fiction back to reality by using the transitional concept of a 'mythical Dwana'...

Dwana's back, a little bruised and still having some after-effects from her surgery but in a good mood and brightening up things at work. She called this morning and offered me a ride. I spent most my time at work delving into the innards of a relational database. I did call the unemployment office to see if taking a class would hurt my ability to get unemployment and apparently it would be okay. I don't know if I'll be able to get everything together before UK starts next week, but at least maybe if I'm still down to 20 hours, the spring may be a good time to go back. I figure in terms of my programme, I really only need to take qualifying exams, finish (and defend) my dissertation, and fulfill the residency requirement for a doctorate. Now that my health is back on track, I'd like to finish what I started. I may check in on getting a certificate in women's studies, since my main concentration in history is social history/women's history. One of the faculty advisors who was connected to the chorus once suggested it to me, but at the time I wasn't sure I wanted to do any more classes. And although I am a feminist (and by that I mean someone who believes a person should be able to pursue a career or other life choices regardless of gender, thus men should be able to stay at home with the kids, women should be able to be engineers, whatever most fulfills them), I'm not exactly the most 'politically correct' kind out there. So, I'm not sure if I'd do well with a lot of femi-babble. We'll see. But first, I need to talk to the history department about the feasibility of going straight for the phD. After all, I don't need another master's. So maybe the cut in hours is a blessing in disguise. And I would be willing to go a little further into debt for a structured period of time, with another advisor (I love my retired advisor, but I need help in setting a good timeline to get me out the door and through the process), if it could lead to more security and a broader base. Even if I could not find a faculty position, an advanced degree could help in pursuing academic librarianship, mean more money, etc., and certain colleges would be more likely to hire a faculty member with qualifications to teach and manage library services. Several people have been supportive of the idea of my return. For the first time since my health issues became such a problem I feel like I can focus, remember, and deal with the stress of preparing for the orals. Go me!

After work Dwana stopped back by and I took her to Applebee's for half-priced appetizers and dessert. I had a gift certificate for helping out with employee appreciation week. Then we stopped by Wal-Mart where I found dog food, 88 cent underwear, and a putrid green binder (55 cents--and not just because of the colour--there were others that were perfectly normal!)which is much roomier and perfect for keeping my Cthulhu character sheets in. :) (I wonder if I can get a biohazard sticker from work. It would be perfect on the binder! For it also denotes the sign of Shub-Niggurath. Long story. Read Lovecraft or check out Chaosium products.)

Then I went over to Dwana's and we visited, I played with her cats, and I did some laundry over at her house. We discovered even further parallels in our lives. Later, her husband came home from mowing yards and was very, very tired. We were watching Emeril (I've never actually done that) and he was making a yummy beer-and-coconut battered shrimp dish for an audience of all-men. At one point they brought out sandwiches and I pointed out that they were all masticating in tandem. I think Eric thought I said something entirely different. :O

So, now I'm back home, ready to call it a night. Spock and Darius are both spread out on the bag I brought the tomato home in. I don't know if it smells like Dwana's cats or what. I'm not sure what Dar-Bar would do if he met Simba, her 22-lb. attack cat. Run, I think. Cerys is snoring. Buns is lurking in the bathroom ready to jump out at any moment as usual. Hope your corner of the world is as peaceful.

Ah...

There is nothing quite like a true, vine-ripened, grown-the-garden, juicy, wonderful tomato with just a little salt. Even the Farmer's Market tomatoes didn't have quite the same luxurious wonderfulness. Thank you, Dwana's family!

Correction

Sent to info@ap.org:

Please note that in the following story:

Parkinson's Gene Therapy Study Begins by Malcolm Ritter...

there is an error. The University of Auckland is in New Zealand.

Thought you might want to correct that.

Do'ya think they'd hire me? Or just dismiss me as an annoying know-it-all??? Still, I'm sure the Kiwis hate reading stuff like 'the University of Auckland in Australia.'

Very nice quiz...many results possible.

E.T.!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

I definitely needed a quiz. I just spent 2 hours trying to catch a bus home from downtown. The buses had to do many detours (so I missed the first one I tried for), then had to fight traffic to line up on High Street (behind the transit centre) in order to pick us up. That's because there's a race tonight (Midsummer Night's Run), and they blocked off Vine Street. But I'm home, finally. :)

Ever BlogChalked?

This is my new blogchalk:
United States, Kentucky, Lexington, Idle Hour, English, Eilir, Female, 36-40, libraries, reading. :)

Didn't expect that one...

So, I was listening to CNN's Carol Costello for updates on the blackout and she was supposedly talking to someone on the phone from the power company and when he said power would be up in an hour or two she asked him how sure he was of this because the last they'd heard it was supposed to be up by 1 am and he said, 'would you bang Howard Stern?'. Needless to say, she asked him to repeat, he did, and then she cut him off fairly professionally with a 'that's disgusting' and then moved on. I don't know if he was with the power company or what. If so, he may not be much longer. :)

Happy Friday

Here's the latest Friday Five:

1. How much time do you spend online each day? This is frightening, but keep in mind that I'm a librarian, so it includes a lot at work...maybe 7-8 hours.

2. What is your browser homepage set to? At work, it's My Yahoo!, which is the personalised version of Yahoo!; at home, it's set to the entry page for Alltel users.

3. Do you use any instant messaging programs? If so, which one(s)? Yes. Plain, generic AIM.

4. Where was your first webpage located? http://www.geocities.com/Athens/7296 (since 1996)

5. How long have you had your current website? This site has been up since October 2001.

Do you have asthma?

FDA issues warning to users of asthma drug salmeterol (Seravent Inhalation Aerosol, Serevent Diskus, and Advair Diskus)

Keep in mind that they say abruptly stopping a steroid can also be dangerous. But check out the story, and talk to your doctor if you're taking these medicines. The potential problems seem to have greater incidence in those of African descent.

Do you ever feel like the world's turned upside down?

Here in the South, I'm sitting in relative comfort listening the coverage of the massive blackout hitting the Northeast US and Southern Canada. I'm glad that it doesn't appear to be caused by terrorism and that (so far) people seem to be taking things relatively calmly. I hope that holds. I wonder how some people I know in New Jersey and New York are doing. I'm not sure if my cousin is still in Pennsylvania, or if he'd be affected. But here's to a safe blackout without rioting, etc. Our multi-day outage from February is still fresh in my mind (ice storm, if you haven't been reading). I had been one of the lucky ones without power for only a day, but it took awhile to get everyone back up, with power workers coming from out of state to help. Of course, those were downed lines at issue. This seems to have been a rolling cascade, but a quick one (such a large area out in about 3 minutes!) I was surprised that one hospital in NYC required generator to be brought in from outside. I guess I'm used to our building, which has fuel oil and generator capacity for several days, food, water, etc. laid in at all times. Of course, we're tiny by comparison, so it's easier to plan. We've got a plan for just about everything. The one thing I don't think is written up in the policies is what we'll ever do if we have a chemical spill or airbourne pathogen and we've sealed up our rooms, broken out the playing cards--and then realise there's nowhere provision for using the bathroom (I guess we pee in the plastic box all the supplies are kept in). Before you laugh, consider that the overwhelming majority of people in the hospital are female). Yeah. I know. I think of these things in the shower. But back to the disaster at hand.

I first heard about it when I was about to leave work; one of my co-workers was called by her son, who had be watching CNN. I realise that New York is a very major city, but I was tired of hearing only about NYC, so I went online to see what was going on in the rest of the cities that were affected. The CBC posed a somewhat insipid question of 'how are you being affected by the power outage in your area' which leads to a forum for discussing memories of other outages, tips for coping, etc. Insipid in the sense that most people affected won't be able to respond, and judging from some of the replies, many of those who are away from the fray couldn't care less. Still, there are isolated pockets of people reporting and some genuine humour (my favourite: 'it's my daughter's fault--I told her not to touch that wire'. :)

Another weird thing is the bizarre weather they've been having in Europe. They're saying 3000 people may have died in France. I was reading one BBC story about power outages where they did an oops and said the temps were near 90 degrees C in New York and Canada. That's Fahrenheit, of course, really, and thank goodness. Temps in Europe are running near 30 degrees Celsius, into the 100s F, and it's got to be miserable. Believe me, I do sympathise. Back in the 80s I spent an excruciating summer in the Midwest, in southern Kansas, where the temps topped 100 F every day for over 60 days. My mom cooked on a Hibachi in her swimsuit. It was awful, and people were dropping like flies. The state and cities were giving away fans and air conditioners, especially to the elderly, who are more sensitive. I had moved to Kansas from the California desert; it was hot but dry. Here in Kentucky (and in the other states I've lived in, Louisiana and South Carolina) it's the humidity that will get you. The other day I was able to open up the apartment without trouble. Today is very muggy, and going without the air conditioning messes with my asthma. Hard to believe, but I don't really remember air conditioning growing up. I know in California we didn't have air conditioners, we had water coolers that worked through evaporation on the tops of houses. Even thirty years ago, most houses here didn't have central heating or cooling, and my mom and I were always the type to run around with the windows of the car down rather than cranking on the AC. But at least we have consistent hot, muggy weather. For those people who are experiencing a once-in-150-year (or for those with the power outages, maybe a once-in-30-year) bit of unbearable heat, good luck, run cool baths, and wear as little as possible.

A night neither fit for man (read woman) nor beast...

It's a toss-up I'd say. Which would you find more invigorating?

Being thrown to the ground and dragged by a rambunctious, strong, dog who sees another dog and wants to play?

Mind you, it's not just mud. It's more like muck, with dog shit, moss, algae, maple seeds, etc., etc., and I'm still picking it out of my ear and hair and teeth and nursing the shoulder, head, and butt I fell on. Trust me to find a tree root with my shoulder. The good news is that I managed to only get a little scraped, I don't think anything was broken--merely bruised, and I held onto the dog so she wouldn't run out into traffic. And no, she isn't mine, and no, I've never had this happen before. My motto is generally 'constant vigilance!' but she still managed to surprise me. I was heading in one direction and she suddenly went in another, dragging me up and out of my shoe and onto the ground. At least she didn't pull me down the hill into traffic. Still, I did manage to pull her back and I think I convinced her that she is not an alpha female after all. Later we made up and except for being a little sore, all is right with the world. In retrospect I wish I could have seen it happen--it was definitely rather cartoonish, I think. And no, she isn't a giant dog--maybe 80 lbs, tops. But her centre of gravity is much lower than mine. Don't you love science in action?

Or would you prefer having a cat suddenly start gushing blood all over the place?

Spock decided to lay down on Buns, which generally pissed Buns off, seeing as he's about 7 lbs and Spock's about 12 lbs. As I was trying to extricate the Stupid One off the ailing one, Spock's rear claw sliced into one of Buns' trouble spots (he licks his fur until he's raw). It took me a moment to realise that Buns was bleeding profusely--he ran away hissing and Spock had clawed me in the process. (Mind you, I'd just trimmed his claws, but I must have missed that one). Anyway, after a couple of paper towels didn't work too well because they stuck to the wound, I got my non-stick gauze pads and Co-Ban (a bandage wrapping that sticks to itself; they use it on your arm when you give blood to put pressure on the site) and wrapped him up really well. I think he's doing better. Once he'd stopped leaking all over the place he went to eat and is acting pretty normal, except he's giving Spock a very wide berth. He's sitting between my hands right now. I don't see any evidence of the blood making it through the bandage, so here's hoping the pressure's enough to get it stopped. I've stayed up a little later to make sure.

I love animals. Really. Truly. But they are sometimes an adventure. Sigh. Buns is okay, I think. I'm going to bed now...

Because I'm feeling a little depressed myself today...I need a little boost

So, here's a little quote for the day:

To believe is to know that every day
is a new beginning.
It is to trust that miracles happen,
and dreams really do come true.
To believe is to see angels dancing among the clouds,
To know the wonder of a stardust sky
and the wisdom of the man in the moon.
To believe is to know the value of a nurturing heart,
The innocence of a child's eyes
and the beauty of an aging hand,
for it is through their teachings we learn to love.
To believe is to find the strength
and courage that lies within us.
When it is time to pick up the pieces and begin again.
To believe is to know we are not alone,
That life is a gift and this is our time to cherish it.
To believe is to know that wonderful surprises
are just waiting to happen,
And all our hopes and dreams are within reach.
If only we believe.

--Author Unknown

Sorry to be missing in action...

Both Monday and Tuesday I was asleep by 8pm with the idea of getting up in an hour and slept until 4am. I seem to be incapable of taking a nap when I feel this drained. Anyway, I feel much better. I'm trying to decide if I'm slipping back towards depression or if I'm just emotionally exhausted. I have been taking my medicine faithfully, though, so hopefully that will help. Things that have been going on in my life.

• Finished both my resume and curriculum vitae. Now, for the worst part...cover letters. I hate writing cover letters.
  
• Have a line on three jobs. One is with the state, but hasn't posted yet. One is at EKU. One is...and I can't say this without smiling, just because I have a novel character I've worked on with this background...but one is paid training to be a private investigator for $27-$35 an hour. Now, before you laugh, consider that 95% of private investigating is not driving Ferraris, but is doing tedious research, something at which I excel. It would be interesting work that I could do part-time whilst keeping my current job/benefits. I figure, nothing ventured, nothing gained. And here in Kentucky you only have to be 18 years old to be a PI--there aren't any other requirements. I know one other librarian who has made the jump to that profession.
  
• Was somewhat surprised to find I had no electricity this afternoon when I came home--surprised because I'd called the company at the end of last week to make sure I was not in danger of being shut off and was told I had until the 20th. Apparently that was a mistake, although they're going to pull the call records and credit my reconnect fee if they can verify it. The good news is that since I planned to pay it this week anyway, I was able to pay over the phone and get it back on within the hour. Is it just me, or do I have awful luck sometimes? I am getting to a point where I see no reason to believe anyone anymore--or at least maybe just three people--my mom and my closest friends. Is that jaded? On the other hand, something told me not to go straight to the gym but come on home, and I would have otherwise not come home until after customer service ended.
  
• Dwana made it through surgery okay and is recovering at her parents' house in Harrison county. She called me yesterday to let me know. On the one hand, I'm glad she's doing okay. On the other, work seems sadly empty without her around. However, in her absence, you're going to get an eyeful with the next bullet, because I just have to vent.
  
• I have reached that point where, although I appreciate their concern, if one more person asks me 'how are you doing' in that concerned, hushed tone of a workplace shocked by cutbacks, I think I'll scream. I think part of it is that no one can quite believe that the cuts are over for now, although we're supposed to be safe through 2004. And although I know it's partly concern for me, a lot of it is concern for themselves. One guy asked during the town meeting whether I'd been give a severance package, and I know he was motivated by his sense of justice. But someone else just walked up to me the other day and asked point blank, no expression of concern, just wanting the info. I think others are afraid that even if they aren't laid off, per se, they'll have a reduction in hours which could be potentially worse. I had a couple of days of denial, followed by a small breakdown where I got my emotions and my brain on the same level, and now I'm working to move on. That said, I know there's still a lot an emotional morass to deal with. Yes, I feel betrayed. Yes, I'm sad. Yes, I'm angry that for years I was told to accept abyssmal wages ($9.02-$13.37 an hour for a professional library position) because the benefits, work environment, and stability of our jobs offset any deficit. And damn it, I was beginning to believe them. So, yes, I'm disappointed; that's only natural. On the other hand, I don't blame anyone in particular, and I oddly enough don't seem to have the negative attitude that some of the others at work have. I've been up front about my feelings, but I'm tired of revisiting the issue every few minutes. If I need to vent about things, I have this blog and my friends and family. I don't want to deal with the emotions whilst at work, but just focus on my job. If they want to vent, well, I'm not feeling particularly sympathetic to fears from people who aren't losing their job or hours at the moment. I've had people come up and say they were surprised they weren't cut. In some cases, so am I. But I don't want to get to a point where I start looking at every co-worker with this critical eye of 'why not them?' or going down hallways and looking at murals that in better years cost more than I make in a year (but of course it's easier to get a donation for something like that rather than to keep people). I'm starting to feel that way, and I don't want my experience at work marred by that. I think I'll work past it, but only if I'm not constantly reminded by everyone else. Does that make any sense? At the same time, I'm not a fan of people going 'let's not talk about anything because you might offend her' so I guess for now, I'll just weather the encounters as they happen. Over the years, I've become the sort of 'bartender in 10 forward' [Start Trek: Next Generation reference--think Whoopi Goldberg] for the hospital, the place everyone, from co-workers to parents, talk and vent, and I've always been conscientious of listening, because it might be the only outlet a person has, and they know it's not going to go further with me. It's one of the ways I've become so interconnected into the hospital. With everything, I guess, I still want to be there for people-both in terms of services and the unofficial ways, too. But I don't know how well that'll work after my hours change.
  
• That said, I'm hopefully not going to make the same mistake by sending one of the women who was laid off a card. I didn't know any of the others well, but I really wish I'd had a chance to say goodbye to Jayna. The card has a picture of Garfield that reads: 'When life is getting you down, sometimes it helps to seek out one of those cheery people who never stop smiling...and kick their butt clear into next week!' I think she'll appreciate that one better than something happy and 'you'll make it' sort of drivel. She has that sort of sense of humour. When I was perusing the classified Sunday I found a job more suited for her, public relations/writing for the Department of Education. So I'll send that clipping. I figure if she doesn't want it, she can just throw it away, but I don't want her to think we don't care--because of all the cuts, that's the one which made the biggest impact, since she was full-time, a public relations director, and involved in just about every aspect of the hospital and in many ways our line to the outside world. You can't go to any other organisation with which we deal without someone mentioning her. She has a very engaging (but not overly perky or annoying) personality. She's also had a lot of ups in down in life over the last few months, so I'm worried about her.
  
• It's so freaky to hear stories of the Matterhorn being closed due to heat or British motorists giving themselves frostbite with a car air conditioner. Here, where it's quite normal to be hot and muggy in August, it's a little cooler than normal. I don't even have the air conditioner on in the house.
  
• I'm reserving judgement on the new Mel Gibson movie, Passion. On the one hand, as a classicist, I'm intrigued that someone has shot a film in Latin and Aramaic that attempts to stay faithful to the literature surrounding the death of Jesus, and the shots I've seen have been cinematically interesting. On the other hand, there are concerns that elements of the film will incite anti-Semitism by blaming the Jews for that death. Gibson apparently practises a conservative, pre-Vatican II form of Catholicism, and Vatican II among other things removed this stigma from the canon of Catholicism. Since the film has not yet been through a final edit or release, this is just speculation. But it will be interesting to see what happens. I think sometimes people forget that Jesus was Jewish or that the Roman occupation of Judaea made for a very complex set of circumstances, or for that matter, that according to Christian doctrine, this was the plan of God all along.
  
• Yay to the American Bar Association, which voted to support state laws allowing gays to adopt their partner's children. This gives the kids the benefit of two parents and legal protection in terms of being able to get insurance, benefits, etc.

Can you tell I've been listening to CNN? I'm leaving out macabre details of Ted Williams' post-mortem or waterspouts, or dramatic rescues from a river in China. You can check those things out for yourself. I guess that's all for now. I'm going to go back to bed until the sun comes up, anyway. I just needed to get something into my system and feed the animals.

I am Chim-Chim Bubblehead

Which is imminently better than my birthname, which produces Snotty Gizzardhead. :)

From the e-mail rounds: This only takes a minute and its fun. Please don't be a bore and ruin it. Send it onto everyone you know including the person
that sent it to you. Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. Here is your dose.... Follow the instructions to find your new name. The following in an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants" by Dave Pilkey:

The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:
a = poopsie
b = lumpy
c = buttercup
d = gadget
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = fluffy
h = cheeseball
i = chim-chim
j = stinky
k = flunky
l = boobie
m = pinky
n = zippy
o = goober
p = doofus
q = slimy
r = loopy
s = snotty
t = tootie
u = dorkey
v = squeezit
w = oprah
x = skipper
y = dinky
z = zsa-zsa

Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:
a = apple
b = toilet
c = giggle
d = burger
e = girdle
f = barf
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = cootie
j = monkey
k = potty
l = liver
m = banana
n = rhino
o = bubble
p = hamster
q = toad
r = gizzard
s = pizza
t = gerbil
u = chicken
v = pickle
w = chuckle
x = tofu
y = gorilla
z = stinker

Use the fourth letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:
a = head
b = mouth
c = face
d = nose
e = tush
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = butt
l = brain
m = tushie
n = chunks
o = hiney
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = buns
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = sprinkles
v = kisser
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = brains
z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is Goober Chickenshorts. Now when you SEND THIS ON... use your new name as the subject. And remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day, adults laugh an average of 4 times!

I love the British...

Even when they find they must charge to remain in business, they do it with typical wit:

bmj.com Delamothe and Smith 327 (7409): 241

An excerpt:

. Non-BMA members whose libraries do not yet subscribe to the BMJ have nearly 18 months to persuade them to do so, or to save up for a personal subscription.

:) Although it's a shame they're going to have to charge for access, I find I can't really complain too much. The BMJ has bucked current trends for years by allowing anyone to access their content online, for free. They seem to be dedicated to keeping that access free for those practising in developing countries who do not have the other resources for information available here. How many publishers do you know that still feel a mandate to get information to the places it's most desperately needed, for free? :)

On a sadder note, for me, I was going through some of my back mail and realised I'd overlooked a notice that Victoria magazine, devoted to all things Victorian and the charm of that era, has ceased publication. It was an American publication, but full of much Anglophilia. I've both subscribed and gathered them like fresh vegetables at the grocery store; they're sort of a secret vice, full of cottages, writers-in-residence, quaint stores, etc.--all promoting a certain lady-like entrepreneurship for those of us who haven't sold our souls to the latest fads but prefer the timeless classics--Victorian style but for a modern age. Most 'home' or 'fashion' magazines I've read were recycled or discarded quickly. These I've kept, because they cheer me whenever I go back through them. Sigh. It makes me want to fix a lovely tea in memoriam.

Give me something to sing about!

Library Songs to hum at Work (from Biblia's Warrior Librarian Weekly)

...and these too...

yet another Gilbert & Sullivan parody

...and ones someone's actually recorded.

So, I'm basically a martyr...

...whether misunderstood daemon...
Results...: "
Hiei

Which Yu Yu Hakusho Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla"

...or self-sacrificing hero

Oy ve...

It's amazing how you can be cruising along fine, even in the midst of a crisis, and then the littlest things set you off emotionally. Today I got up, went downtown, got some quarters for laundry, gave in the last of my outstanding library books, ate at Subway, watched the Shriners parade, worked out--had a good walk of 15 minutes and cycled 4.5 miles. Then I went to the Farmer's Market and got some fresh corn, tomatoes, eggplant, potatoes, real wild blackberries (yum!) and a pound of Amish hand-churned butter. So far, so good. Then I stopped back by the library to see if I could pay my fine, discovered they'd charged me $30 for not returning an insert to a CD (I couldn't find it at the time, and figured the CD was more important, after all). And, well, emotionally I just fell apart. I guess everything has been building up, and between watching the Shriners run around in their little cars (which I love, by the way, especially when I can watch clowns from a distance), but after all, they're also in a way my bosses, so it brought back the problem of having my hours cut, and spending even what little I did on groceries, and then feeling like I had done a Terrible Thing as a librarian by losing the insert (which mind you, happened because the case was broken when I got it and every time I turned around, a cat was knocking it off the shelf)--well, I felt like a big, fat loser who shouldn't even be a librarian. Also, I'd gone two days without my Paxil, so that probably had a big chunk to do with it. It didn't help that I was crying in a bus depot and I had some guy who was trying to make small talk when, quite frankly, I wanted to be left the hell alone.

So...I called my friends and cancelled my plans with them (no sense in inflicting an emotional ball of goo on your friends, I figure). I went back on the bus and got my Paxil refilled. Now I'm home and I've eaten some bread with the butter and blackberry jam and put some calming music on and, well, I feel a little better. I guess I was putting off my breakdown from all the cutbacks at work off until the weekend. That breakdown lasted only about 20 minutes, but I feel all tired and generally nothing like I usually do when I've gone to the gym. I just feel like curling up in a ball, even though I really need to do laundry and some cleaning. I think I'll eat something with a little more protein, drink some caffeine, and give the Paxil a chance to work before trying to go on with the day. I'm going to post this on both blogs because it's relevant and most of you don't read this one. But I think in the long run, I feel better. Here's to getting some rest today and tackling the world again tomorrow.

Wow.

Ever wonder what creative math nerds can do with Legos(TM)? These are really nifty, especially the Escher renditions.

ASL's LEGO Page

Whoop! Accidentally put this one on my other blog yesterday...

Dogged Determination

I'm so glad this dog survived. But his story also makes people think of all the abandoned dogs who aren't so fortunate.

Please spay or neuter your pets. And if you find you can no longer care for one, do not just 'throw them away'--even at a supposed animal shelter. They are often simply too overwhelmed. You might relieve your conscience by thinking you've 'done the right thing', but more than likely you've simply taken a coward's way out of throwing the animal to its death. Some places have no real regulations in dealing with euthanasia. Here in Kentucky, for example, it's hard to get some counties to stop shooting dogs or burying them alive. There are 'fly by night' rescues, too, although they need to be inspected carefully. Often they can work with you to find someone to adopt a pet with you still taking care of the animal. And a well socialised pet who is current on all vaccinations is a lot easier to place than a neglected one.

This is incredibly, wonderfully cool. Or sick. I'm not sure which.

But if you have some time, play at: NobodyHere

Owie

I took the bus home tonight and promptly stepped off onto some uneven ground and fell down. This is the third time this year. I didn't think I was hurt, but now both my ankle and back say otherwise. Well, as my mom always said, there was a reason I wasn't named Grace. Still, I suspect if I hadn't been exercising regularly, it could have been worse.

I think the Power Yoga was a mistake the other day...so many lunges up and down. For one, I discovered muscles where I didn't even realise I had them (like on either side of the 'cleft in the buttocks' to put it nicely). But that's fine--I was a little sore for a day but didn't think anything of it. But I also have a heel stone, which is the beginning of plantar fasciitis, and although I don't think I've been overdoing the walking I could see where the bouncing of the Power Yoga might have aggravated it. So, I took some Tylenol, took a day off from my workout, and I am hoping to do my regular cardio workout tomorrow. I'll save the Power Yoga for after I can get my feet, legs, and knees properly conditioned.

I also got word from Dwana, whose friend Aaron also joined and actually got a tour, that there is a pool hidden in the downtown club. It's under the cardio theatre. So I definitely plan on checking that out!

I am SSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad this week of hell is over. Work has been difficult given the cutbacks. One good thing, though, I figured out how to get my entire electronic catalogue onto my PDA with SmartList, a database program for the handheld. I also figured out how to get barcodes to work on that database. I can now enter a barcode and then later scan a book and it'll automatically search the records for a match. None of the other programs did that so easily. Now I have to see if I can get the hospital to spring for $49 for the program. The IT diden't think it would be a problem, since it's so cheap.

Anyway, that's all the update I have for now. Have a good weekend.

I love Edward Gorey. If he weren't dead, I'd adopt him into the family. Then again...that might make it easier. He'd make a wonderful eccentric uncle.

You will be smothered under a rug. You're a little
anti-social, and may want to start gaining new
social skills by making prank phone calls.


What horrible Edward Gorey Death will you die?
brought to you by Quizilla

Thankfully, it's Friday

1. What's the last place you traveled to, outside your own home state/country? Hunting Island, South Carolina.

2. What's the most bizarre/unusual thing that's ever happened to you while traveling? Hmmm...in terms of actually traveling, the weather as we were moving from California to Kansas. We started out in 104 degree weather with the cats panting in the car. We stopped overnight in Arizona and woke up to 6 inches of snow (this was the last week of March, mind you) and drove through the Painted Desert and couldn't see the formations for the snow. With New Mexico came dust storms that followed us all the way through Oklahoma. Now, my honeymoon to a pagan gathering in Atlanta is legendary (includes the Ku Klux Klan, the American Indian Movement, lightning strikes, Latin conjugations, a chant of 'Lisa has to pee', having a Chevette die on a four-lane highway whilst coming back from buying the first pads for a young girl who'd started menstruating, unleashed hounds, torrential downpours, bubbas with guns (both the KKK's and the ones on our side), Georgia State troopers, and oh, the guy with the sword who kept catching fireflies to read his watch). But technically I was stationary for most of that. :)

3. If you could take off to anywhere, money and time being no object, where would you go? I would cruise around the world on the Queen Elizabeth II, first class.

4. Do you prefer traveling by plane, train or car? I've never been on a train, although I would love to. I hate flying. I know it's safer than traveling by car, but I hate the idea of not being able to pull over if something goes wrong. So, for now, I'd have to say car.

5. What's the next place on your list to visit? If I ever get a reliable car I want to take a trip up to New England during the fall, watch the autumn colours, and do a little genealogy.

Hi, again...

I found out today that I will most likely be able to get unemployment. Yay! The only catch is the unemployment office wants me to come down the week my hours are cut back rather than applying early, like human resources suggested. It looks like if all goes well (keep your fingers crossed) I should be able to draw an amount about $10 in gross pay less than what I would have made normally, so that's not too bad in outlook. It's just a little to iffy for me right now, though.

I talked to my mom tonight. She had been worried about me because she couldn't get a hold of me. Fortunately, everybody at home is fine. That's one less thing to worry about, at least.

That's enough of an update for now...I'm going to go see what's happening over at the Friday Five.

It's been a very, very difficult day...

...but I'm hanging in there.

Yesterday afternoon I was called into my boss' office and told that my position was going to be cut to 20 hours, from its current 35. This had nothing to do with my performance--it has to do with the fact that our system lost $3 billion in trust money over the last couple of years and for the first time in 78 years, we've had to lay off people to balance an upcoming budget with no increase in funding and certain uncontrolled costs necessary to run the hospitals. In their defence, they tried to minimise things as much as possible--only seven positions out of over 200 were affected, and of those, two were vacant. Yesterday I was in a state of shock--quiet shock. I didn't cry. I didn't get angry. I didn't shout. I haven't been this stunned since the attacks of 9/11. But my brain shut down and I couldn't think anymore, and Dwana drove me out of the city to her special bridge where I could watch the birds and turtles and feel some amount of joy. She knew just what to do, and I'm grateful. Later, after I came home, I went to bed and stayed there for over 12 hours, then got up to face the day.

At that point I knew others had been affected but no details. Today I went to a town meeting. It turns out that one person was moved from one department to another--changing hours, which will be difficult on her, but at least she has a job. Three people were laid off, including our public relations director. There was no real notice, although they were given a severance package. Just here one day and gone the next. We didn't even get to say goodbye. Since I'm the only librarian in the hospital, everyone knew that my position was affected when the announcements came.

You have to understand that I work for a system that is somewhat anchronistic. It's not only non-profit; it doesn't even bill for patient care at the hospital. For many this has become a haven, a place to practise medicine the way it should be--without a bottom line determining the care. Over the six years I've been here, the one thing that kept me here was that despite low pay, it was an incredibly stable position, and I needed stability in my life whilst trying to get my health--both physical and mental--together. Yesterday that went out the window.

The good thing, of course, is that I do still have a job. I don't go down to the new schedule until September 8th. I may even be able to collect unemployment for the involuntary reduction in hours. I might be able to find a part time job, which combined with this one, could put me in a better position overall. I keep my benefits, and the benefits at my workplace are quite good--full payment for any hospitalisation; hell, having a baby costs a total of $10, and my part of my medical and dental insurance is about $10 a paycheque. I'm not sure most people could say they have as good of a plan. My hours will be 10am-2:30pm, so I should be able to get a part-time job in the evenings, still have time to go to the gym and have a life, etc.

The bad thing is that for the first time I was in a position to start planning for the future. I'd gotten my loans consolidated and was getting my full cheque, finally. I was making enough that in a month or so I could start going to credit counseling to eventually buy a house.

All that's now on hold. If I can get the unemployment, it may not be so bad. At 20 hours I can still pay my rent, if little else. I won't be out on the street, at least. And in the long run this may be good because it may get me to go for a full-time position that can pay what I'm worth. One librarian's already sent me info on a position that hasn't posted yet. All is not lost.

I have to admit--and I told my boss this--I am angry. Angry that for years I was told that I should take lower pay in exchange for the stability of our system. Angry that over time my position has been degraded, even if that was not their intent. First they made the master's 'preferred' rather than 'required'. Then director signatures were required on requisitions. Then I wa no longer needed at manager's meetings--all for good, logical reasons that together ran at counterpoint to the expansion I made in library services. That expansion cannot continue on reduced hours--it will take everything just to maintain service quality. I'm also angry that in some ways I'm in a worse position than the people who were laid off entirely--they can definitely get unemployment and have the severance to fall back on. The fact that I'm working part time may actually hinder me both in seeking unemployment and getting another job--all of which basically suck.

But I am glad, if it must happen, it's happening now, when I can deal better with change. If this had happened last year, I'd be suicidal. All things considered, I'm taking things calmly. And I've had this huge outpouring of support by people at work, of all levels of position. My boss, who had nothing to do with the decision, had the response of 'how can cutting her small salary do any real good'? One of the maintenance men asked the admininstrator in a public meeting (I was there, although I don't think he realised it) if I was going to get a package, too. Later he told me he figured if they were cutting me 38% in hours, I should at least get a portion of what the others got to help me. I'm not sure I agree. After all, I was at least given a month's notice, and it's not like I'm being severed. Still, his heart was in the right place. Everyone keeps expecting me to complain or cry, breakdown, whatever. But I don't feel like that. It won't help to. Instead I'm working on my resume and looking at job sites and contacting the unemployment office. Thank the Gods for all that distress tolerance coaching I got in therapy. :)

And although, yes, I'm disappointed and angry and have all the emotions you'd expect, I'm not angry at any person, per se, just the situation. Those decisions were horrible to make. No one ever has had to be 'let go' from the hospital. I'm not sure most of you can even conceive of that sort of environment. And everyone knows everyone else. I thought the administrator was going to cry during our meeting. One co-worker who works at human resources said she's walking the halls with her heads down, because others are angry, blame them, etc. I'm sort of surprised, but a lot of people seem more upset on my behalf than I am. I don't know if they're scared for their own jobs, but we've been told that thse cuts are for 2004 and there will be no more layoffs, and I do believe them. When we had to reduce the budget for this year, they promised no layoffs for that round of cuts. And they followed through. Even though they're sometimes backwards, I still love the place and what we do. Does that make me a glutton for punishment? But with their economic decisions I may be forced to make my own. I'm looking, but I'm holding off on making any real decisions until I find out about unemployment. I don't want to get a second job only to screw myself over, if it won't pay enough and loses me the benefits I could use.

Still, if you know of a part-time or full-time position in the area, I'm now a librarian for hire...

Yes! Hurrah for men's lib!

Yahoo! News - Heatwave puts Swedish bus driver in touch with his feminine side

Another look at how the publishing world's grip on medical research is being challenged

A Fight for Free Access To Medical Research (washingtonpost.com)

Scholarship changes to meet the digital world...

In DSpace, Ideas Are Forever

Need help working on privacy issues in your library?

ALA | Draft Guidelines for Developing a Library Privacy Policy

Need to convert a PDF to something more accessible?

Try: Adobe Acrobat - Adobe PDF Conversion by Simple Form

This can be useful if you need plain HTML for accessibility devices such as screen readers, need to manipulate a file's information, put it on a PDA (although there are lots of converters out there for that, too). With this one, you just type in the URL, and it gives you the text without the header you find in Google.

From the okay-it's-free-speech-but-they-bear-watching headlines...

Car Crash Reveals Racist Church

Hmpf. 'Southern Home Improvement Centre'? That's a creative term up there with 'Final Solution'.

Hmm...I can imagine some minister talking about the sins of alcohol and divine retribution...

CNN.com - Fire engulfs seven-story bourbon warehouse in Kentucky - Aug. 4, 2003

What an awful waste of good bourbon. 19,000 barrels! Still, at least it looks like no one was hurt.

Monday Musings

Heard from my friend Tracy today. She's getting ready to move into a house with her fiance and they've tentively set a wedding date in December. Go Tracy!!!) Sounds like she's in for a busy few months. I'd love to see her get married, although I don't think there'd be any way to get out to Las Vegas then. She does, however, promise there won't be any Elvi. Tracy, if you're reading, I hope the move goes well (friends who move you for pizza and beer are usually much better than actual movers in the opinion of this military brat--so long as you don't give them beer until AFTER everything's moved.

*yawn*

I am tired, mainly because of the giant gym workout I did. Yes, I know, I haven't been properly blogging about that--you're probably wondering if I'm even go. Suffice to say that I have been going to the gym about three times a week. I'm still somewhat elliptical-challenged, but I've increased the treadmill to 3 mph and a 1.0 incline for 15 minutes and the bike to level 4 for 15 minutes. I've already exceeded some expectations--there was some talk of me going two or three times and then giving up. On Saturday I went to the Richmond Road gym. (See my comments here, on my main blog). Although I like the atmosphere at the Executive club better, I felt pretty comfortable on Saturday afternoon, and I went back tonight. See, they have classes that run later and work better with my schedule there.

It was noisier/more people, but it was interesting to people watch whilst up on the treadmill stage. There was one guy in a wheelchair working his arms on weights. The size of people really ran the gamut--tiny wisps of things and bulky guys, of course, but I was not the fattest person there, and several guys had paunches.

I did the treadmill and then went to my first class--Power Yoga. Now, I've been doing some yoga for a few years--at home to Yoga Journal tapes. It's mostly a more meditative style (and when possible, I do yoga to Rodney Yee--he's dreamy, and has a very soothing voice). I have an AM and PM tape, yoga for meditation, and yoga for beginners. I do pretty well with these, although the PM tape has a lot of lunges and that's difficult with my knees.

This is an hour-long class where you're constantly changing positions, and it was more difficult than any yoga I've done before. A lot of poses involved 'plank' poses which are glorified pushups. But, that said, I did pretty well (and I even got a purple smiley sticker for going). Apparently most are regulars and I was the first newbie, and the teacher congratulated me at the end. I did not attempt crow position (where you lever your body onto your arms) and I simplified some of the lunges, but otherwise did okay. Yoga stresses stretching and opening up the breath, not working through pain or doing too much. That said, I suspect I'll be sore tomorrow. It's funny how various people can do certain things. Even with my weight, I can bend at the back and stretch my hamstrings to a point of laying my hands on the floor, and I know skinny people who can't do that because of their tight hamstrings. I have trouble doing anything that involves knee strength or putting my head on my legs (but at least I can blame a shelf-like bosom). We did some balancing poses on one leg that really worked the knees, but that I think will help strengthen my muscles and tendons. I can already tell from walking and cycling that my knees are feeling better. It was, however, harder to relax into the poses on this workout. I know the tapes well enough to go through with my glasses off and just run through the poses. For some of these, I had to look at either the instructor or my fellow students for guidance, and I forgot that glasses and child's pose don't work too well. :)

After class, I cycled for 15 minutes. So in actuality I worked out for an hour and a half, both aerobic and anaerobic exercise. Gee. I think that's the most sustained exercise I've had in years. Hope I don't pay for it tomorrow. Maybe this was a night to bring the bathing suit and hit the whirlpool.

Oh...one more thing. Since I've started working out, I've lost 7 lbs (that's in two weeks) I'm at a shade under 265, and I started at 272. The employee health nurse at work said that it's unlikely ALL of that could be water weight. Yay!

The endorphins are nice. I could see how someone could get addicted to this. Of all the things to get addicted to, however, I guess this is one of the better ones. I'm also finding that if I'm feeling stressed or angry, etc., I think about going to the gym and walking it away. Still, mustn't overdo it. I'm going to go collapse now, all the same. :) I suspect that the muscles I apparently have under all that fat will feel like it tomorrow.

One life...

and its impact on millions.

Yahoo! News - CPR Inventor Safar Dies in U.S.

The medical community has lost a pioneer in lifesaving technique. Peter Safar, the doctor credited with inventing cardiopulmonary resuscitation, survived a Nazi labour camp and emigrated to the United States.

Think of the millions of people this man's ideas have and will in the future save. Think of what might have been if so many millions had not been lost in the wars of the last hundred years. Think of what hatred and intolerance has cost the world.

Still think history doesn't affect you? All events put forth rippled permutations that define our world. Boggles, the mind, doesn't it?

Isn't it refreshing to see the South doesn't have a corner on the market of small-mindedness?

Greenville Michigan Church Burns the Bible

Um...people, do you really think Jesus spoke in Jacobean English?

Yipee!!

We are now staple-positive! Thanks, OfficeWare!!!

PS (about 12:45 PM) And...it's also been a great day for food. They had free Krispy Kremes for breakfast in the adminstrative area (hey, I'm sure I'll work it off at the gym tonight); I had the rest of my biryani and aloo parathi for lunch, and then one of my co-workers, who is Thai and whose dad has a local Thai restaurant, brought me Pad Thai for helping her practice for a wedding photo shoot she did this weekend. Yay!!! I had some with lunch (Indian and Thai in one meal--you can't beat that) and it looks like there will be plenty for dinner and lunch tomorrow. *grin*

I feel happy, I feel happy!!!

1. IT came in today and upgraded my computer memory. I had not realised it, but mine was only (gasp!) 32MB, and now it's 288! It's like having a new computer.

2. I weighed in since it was Monday and I've lost 7 lbs since I started working out at the gym a couple of weeks ago. I'm down to 265. I know it may just be water weight, but still, yay!

Ah, Sunday

What I'm listening to: New Age music channel; just finished 'My Dark Haired Maid from Conraig' (Searles, tradtional Scottish) and going into 'Echoes of Time' (Nakai, a more Native American sound), and now Margie Adam's 'Something About Us'
What I'm eating:Biryani (curried vegetables and lentils on basmati rice) and Aloo Paratha (stuffed bread fried in olive oil), with some dried cranberries for dessert. Yum!
What I'm doing:Blogging, of course, and working on some financial and exercise planning
What I've done today:Wished my mom a happy birthday, gave Cerys a bath, skimmed the current Discover and National Geographic magazines that I borrowed from work, played in the Cthulhu game, worked on some character sheets, and did some reading.
How I'm feeling:Pretty decent. Not nearly as manic as I have the last couple of days. I forgot to take my Paxil and went, not loopy, because I was really productive, but to where I really had a hard time sleeping, talked a mile a minute, felt like spinning my way down the halls at work, that sort of thing. Now I'm a little tired, but it's a good, look-what-I-accomplished sort of tired. Still, sorry if I rambled a lot the last few posts.
Plans for tomorrow:Work. Go to the gym. Get some cleaning done, especially the bathroom and vacuum/shampoo the carpet.

Because it was 'game day', I caught up with my friend Brenda. Since she has dogs, horses, a 6-year-old, and a teenager, I usually call her whenever I feel like my life's particularly 'out there'. But even so, she's had a rougher couple of weeks than normal. She's had to put one dog to sleep and found another dead (she raises/rescues Shelties), hit a bottle lamb with her truck and fortunately didn't hurt it but lost one of her best ewes for no discernable reason (not the usual coyote/wild dog attack), had her brakes go out on her Tundra causing her to wreck (fortunately no one was hurt, but apparently a very large truck can hit a Caddillac and the Caddy wins), which will hike her insurance rates up just as her newly-16-year-old son will be added soon, etc., etc. Poor Brenda. She needs a break. On the brighter side, her main pastime, beyond the game, is writing Tolkien fan-fiction, and she has had a lot of good feedback, including one person who claimed to put Harry Potter V aside unread just to finish her story and a college professor send her honest-to-goodness academic analyses. I'm not a huge Tolkien fan (I love the concept but have issues with his writing), but apparently she has managed to pull off an original non-Tolkien character that people like. With that fan base, I wonder if she could channel the success into some original work, or at least phantasy that where they occasionally publish and pay for fan fiction. She definitely needs to find a genre she can make money at...I suggested that since she's written almost 300,000 words for these people (who clamour for more) maybe she could set up a PayPal donation to at least keep her truck going. :) Here's hoping she's doing better soon. Anyway, if you like Tolkien, you may want to check out her writing. The Henneth Annun site is nice because you don't wind up with all the pop ups that you have on some of the fanfic sites. Enjoy.

Awwwww....

Okay, I really am going to sign off. But before I go, Spock is just draped over the recliner top curled up to Dar Bar and it's just so cute! A few minutes later, Cerys joined in--at least until Darius bounced on to her. Animals--weird but loveable.

Ooooh. Busy day....

It must have been the Friday Five's fault, but despite an attempt to get up around 10am I didn't wake up until 2 in the afternoon. Around 11:30 my mom, whose birthday is tomorrow, stopped by, but neither Cerys nor I apparently heard her at the door. I was ensconced in a really fascinating dream, though--extremely detailed. It started out as if it were part of our Sunday game, where I was myself, taking the part of a character, including some artefacts (found in an excavation for widening Nicholasville Road) as props. But it segued into a very real sort of thing where I had been adopted as a child into modern society but was actually part of an unknown group called the People who lived in a forest in the middle of Lexington, very close to nature. Outsiders attacked just as I received the artefacts. I escaped, but the staff became a broom, and I wound up underground in a complex that ran under a lake near a chemical plant. The People practised a form of magic and had traditions similar to those in the game that are based on the tribes of Werewolf: the Apocalypse. In the midst of the complex I found a group of ecoterrorists who were part of the People, a tribe that lived out in the world of man and could manipulate technology (like the Glasswalkers in our game). I joined their struggle and we were trying to find out where the others had been taken when I woke up.

I know where that all came from. The unknown tribes in the forest came from an article in the latest National Geographic where they're trying to track tribes in the Amazon that have not been contacted by outsiders without actually establishing contact--it's an attempt to preserve their cultures and allow them free rein over their territories but know where to basically keep hands off. That, mixed with the game, the books of Zenna Henderson, my own personal life, and the wilds of Lexington and its constant road construction all put together, made the dream. But it was incredibly detailed. I dream very cinematically--not just in colour but with interesting action scenes and a great deal of detail. If I could record them on some sort of device, I'd only have to edit them and they're usually very coherent to begin with, although they sometimes wend one into another in what would be an illogical fashion in the real world, but is internally consistent. Yeah, I know, weird. I'm used to it, and I get the impression that not everyone dreams that way. I'd love to research cultural impact on dreaming.

Having woken up so late, I still managed to get A LOT done today. I took the bus down to the shopping area of Richmond Road to a jewelry/pawn shop. I finally got rid of my wedding band, turning it into enough cash to get some more cat and dog food, some peanut butter, and lunch at Taco Bell. It was a very strange experience though. I mean, I realise not everyone who walks into a jewelry store to sell something got that something legally, but I needed a picture ID, had to give my social security number, my place of birth, AND my thumbprint, all so I could get $10. Hmmm....Still, considering that when I first tried to find a place to sell it they wouldn't give me anything, that wasn't too bad. I certainly don't want it (I divorced 12 years ago, and I will NEVER use that particular band again--it's probably cursed). It was 14K white gold but fairly thin; I think they only cost us about $50 when we got them, so that worked for me. And although I have no intention of selling any of my other jewelry (I'm not much into jewelry; most of what I have is pretty much sterling silver, which they wouldn't want anyway, and my class ring and my grandmother's wedding ring, both of which are sentimental objects not for sale), I did find out they could appraise my grandmother's ring and give me an estimate of how much it would cost to repair the guard, which is missing three of the small diamonds.

I then got some lunch and walked down Richmond Road a bit to the Gold's Gym there. I wanted to work out but knew the downtown one closed early on Saturdays. So, I decided to check this one out. Actually, I enjoyed it, even though it was all open. I didn't feel like I was in a meat market. They have their treadmills up on a series of platforms, so as you walk, you can watch everything going on. I did 15 minutes on the treadmill at 3 miles an hour on an incline, so it was longer and more intense than I have been doing. I then went over to the elliptical machines (same setup) and did 5 minutes of both regular and reverse mode. (I actually find the reverse easier, but I can't keep it up too long). I didn't do it too long though because my heart rate was in the 160s and I didn't want it to get too high. Then I went over to the bikes and did 15 minutes on level 4. I watched people doing the weight machines and there are definitely several I want to try. The ladies locker room doesn't have the amenities of deodorant and other such items, but it was spacious and had all the same things in it as the executive one downtown. There's a sauna there, too, although I didn't poke around and find it. They also have a smoothie bar and salon integrated into the gym. It's a soothing purple colour inside. I got to see the spinning area (riding bikes to movies), too. I could easily work out at either, and I don't think Dwana or her friend Heather would feel uncomfortable there at all. We should go over there at some point together. N at work is trying to get me to do power yoga class with her, and I think I will. It's about an hour long and I may not be able to do all the lunges, but it's not aerobics or something, just yoga, which should be fine for me. I'm really, really enjoying this. Strange!!! The last time I worked out I wasn't sore the next day at all. With turning things up a notch, though, I may be tomorrow.

Then I went to Kroger and got the pet food. I haven't been there in awhile. It amazes me how much couples fight in the grocery store. I don't normally pay attention too closely, but I ran afoul of two couples whose arguments meant they were blocking the aisles I needed. Really, folks, do you know how bitchy you sound calling your husband an asshole in the store? I mean, I'm not one of those 'never fight in public because no one should know' sorts of people, but still....anyway, finished that up and came home. I took Cerys out and then captured a recliner. I'm not into dumpster diving (I'm still scarred that one of my exes did this regularly) but furniture put out near the dumpster that is in good shape is fair game. It works fine. With the exception of a very small rip in the back and a little wear on the upholstery (but nothing abnormal), it's in great shape. The cats, of course, are convinced that I carried/rolled it down the hill just for them. Darius is on top of the back right now, and Spock is curled up on the seat. Spock grew up in a home with a recliner; he loves sitting on my lap when I'm in the chair. I love being able to put my feet up--they tend to swell a little over the course of the day and it's better for legs with the diabetes. I've put a towel down so Buns won't get directly on the fabric (he licks his skin raw; I'm not sure at this point if its more psychological than itching or not, but I try to protect things as a result).

The one thing I really did want to work on is an art project involving some modeling clay I have. However, now that I have a better idea of how wide the mouth of the jar I'm going to make has to be, I'm thinking I need at least another box of clay. It's this really neat stuff I got at Michaels that looks like regular terracotta but can be baked in an oven rather than kiln-fired--but it doesn't have the tacky look of sculpey. For some reason I've spent all this time thinking it was in powdered form to be mixed with water; now I realise it's ready to use, and one box isn't going to be enough. Since it has to be protected so it doesn't dry out too quickly, I might as well wait until I have some more on hand or at least can run and get some. I also didn't realise it has to air dry completely before it's baked. Once I start this is definitely going to be a long project, and that's hard to do around cats. I'm tempted to work on it over at the hospital after work, if they'll let me fire it in the occupational therapy oven. Hmmm...probably not. I can't imagine the clay being an infection control issue, etc., but you never know.

Oh, I also did some maintenance to the aquarium. I washed the glass top in really hot water (otherwise it attracts those ^*&^%% drain flies), cleared the water pumps intake (the snails love to hang out there), added some whater, and pulled the java moss up away from the bottom of the tank and away from the features so the 'terrain' is more interesting and not likely to strangle the bigger fish. Have I ever mentioned that I love livebearers? My mollies and guppies just keep churning out babies with very little care needed. My mom, who I consider a livebearer guru (I learnt most of what I know about raising fish from her) has had an awful time with their aquarium; they've bypassed the water-softener issue, but there still seems to be something deleterious about the local water, even with conditioning and chloramine removal. I wonder if it's just too acidic; most other fish do well in the soft water, but livebearers are particularly nice for Kentucky because our water is naturally so hard to begin with (all that limestone). Maybe they live in a rare pocket of more acidic water, I dunno. Or maybe the pet stores down there don't have hardy stock. The problem with being an aquarium enthusiast is that even if you're experienced, there are simply times when you'll run up against something odd. I think some of my success is that I use natural plants. My aquarium isn't the cleanest looking--it's got algae, and mulm, and snails, and all the 'bad' things...but it's pretty much what you'd find in a creek, I think. If the drain flies that seem to come from under the apartment building do manage to hatch out a few larvae I just push them in and the fish get an extra meal (and I get fewer adult flies, which is also why you don't have to worry about mosquitoes breeding in an aquarium--there's a livebearer that lives in the Southern US called a mosquito fish and these are basically fancy cousins). When I set the aquarium up, I mixed coral in with the gravel on the advice of someone at the pet store and haven't had any trouble since--it keeps the pH constant.

Suffice to say, though, it was a busy Saturday and I am now very tired and contemplating bed, which is probably good, since I didn't go to sleep last night until about 4am. Since I am 'catching up' on blogging, though, let me just add that I should have sent out a big congratulations last weekend for J, who used to own the comic store I worked in. He got married last Saturday. Since J is in his late forties, early fifties, we'd sort of given up on him. Also, surprisingly enough, she's close to his age (for awhile Jay was in a relationship with a much younger woman that sort of left us shaking our heads at times). Here's to the happy couple. That got me thinking, so I sent an e-mail to Tracy to determine when (if it was set) she's planning to tie the knot. I knew she was planning to move into their new house sometime this month, but I don't know if I've missed her nuptuals or if it's still in the future. It seems that everyone I know is either married (or, if the laws in the US recognised gay marriage, would be), looking into buying a new house, or both. I guess I'm just in that age group where we 'Settle Down'.

Speaking of buying a house, D pointed me to a great local resource for people with lower incomes who want to buy a house. They do lots of educational programmes, for one. But they also do financing, or, if someone's still got debt issues that would preclude the normal route, they have a programme where you lease a house from them for two years and then buy, with a financial counseling programme that you complete. They even help rehabilitate credit for people who cannot get a bank account.

Now that my school loans finally consolidated, I feel like I'm making progress in terms of my credit (although I make very little compared to the amount I owe, my monthly payments are based on income, and I think that will help me when I start looking at car or home loans). Beyond those loans, I owe about $7000 at the most to to various past creditors, much of that debt being from the period of my marriage/divorce and I'm not even sure if it's on my credit report. So, I'm definitely going to get a copy of the report and start working on that. I want to talk to the REACH people too about getting counseling regarding day-to-day and longrange planning of finances. I know that I should be able to live on my salary, because although I'm in the 10th percentile for a librarian's pay, I don't shop a lot or have expensive tastes. My idea of splurging is a $8 book every few months. My trouble is for years I made even less, and then I also had a lot of mental health issues that affected my spending, procrastination of bills, getting late charges, bouncing cheques, etc., etc. The depression and anxiety issues are much better; the counseling I received in life skills and dealing with distress have helped immensely. But it's very hard, once you're behind, to get back to being ahead. I tried to have a friend help me, but rather than learning to plan and budget and the practical stuff I needed to know about finances, she basically saw it as something to take over control of for as long as it interested her, which was about three or four months. I need to know how best to plan so that maybe five or seven years down the road I could have a house, be making my payments on time, and saving for retirement whilst having some emergency funds, too. Until Dwana mentioned it, I'd never even heard the term 'mortgage points'. I've read some Suze Orman so I'm not quite as ignorant as I was. I've always been turned off by financial talk--it's up there with how I used to feel about opera or how I feel about golf. It's just not the focus of my world, and I'm not good at it. I don't believe everything should revolve around your finances or material worth. There's so much more in terms of sprituality, philosophy, public service, whatever. But I've reached a point in my life where I realise it's important to at least give the attention to finances necessary to provide the stabilty to pursue everything else. So here I am, 36 years old, and finally getting a clue about this stuff.

But it's just as well, because I'm finally to a point where I know where I want to be in life. For so long it was 'I want to be able to be on my own' or 'I want to not feel crazy anymore' or 'I want to be healthy'. Now I've achieved those goals, and so I can look forward to more stability. Also, for a long time I was really torn between the academic world and the outside world. For so long I hid in academia because it was comforting; it was the only thing I knew and the only thing I felt good at. I sold myself short in so many ways in terms of social interaction, especially (no wonder, with social phobia). Now, I realise I love being a librarian, I can be happy with being 'just' a librarian all my life, and being a librarian can really fulfill all those plethora of interests. I can be in academia as a librarian, of course--but if I do that it will be because I want to, not because I'm hiding out. Does that make any sense? I also realise that I actually (and who would have ever thought this possible???) have a gift for comforting people, for intereacting with them, for being 'the reasonable one', and for being 'the listener'. I'm even...gulp...beginning to think that I could have a future decent, functional, loving relationship with the right person. But even if I don't, I also realise I can be a competent adult on her own, with a little house and garden, who volunteers for worthy causes and does what she can to make the world a little brighter. And if I can do that, I'm a success, so there's no sense in thinking I'll ever be a failure, even though for years I felt just like that.

Oh, gee. That was a long rant about feelings. I think the upshot is I'm growing up, finally. And it feels good. Wow.

Hope you're having a nice weekend, although hopefully not too busy, whoever you are. 'Night for now.

A couple of notes on the blog

If you ever have trouble with the page not showing everything to the end, go to your browser menu where you can change the text size and click on whichever you like. This should make it work. I don't know why it does it; maybe it's just an Internet Explorer issue, but it occurred to me that some of you may be having the same problem that I do.

Also, the other day I posted an Amber Alert on my blog because it was the first one we had in this area and several of you who read this are in Kentucky. I'll probably post future ones, but I'm not going to pass on the victim's name. I think the Amber Alert is a great idea, and the ticker is, too. But there's a certain ethical dilemma in terms of what happens when an alert is issued and you later find the victim, but there's been a sexual assault? This happened in the case the other day. I also remember when the two girls from the Lancaster, CA area (near Edwards AFB, where I used to live) were found, thanks to the alert, but then what do the media who want to respect the privacy of a rape victim do when it's apparent that's happened, and the names have been all over the place? Since this blog gets archived, I'm going to err on the side of caution but provide links to the actual alert if possible. Hopefully it won't be a common issue. Just wanted to let you know, though.

Here are a couple of paired quizzes (although they weren't designed that way...

Goodnight Moon


Which children's book are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

-AND-


You are.....The Boy Who Died From Eating All of His
Vegetables


Which dysfunctional children's book are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Yahoo! News - Dog Gives Flasher His Come-Uppance

Hee hee. Gives a whole new meaning to not sticking things where they don't belong.

And the burning question is...

Why does the guy from Unshelved only have three fingers and a thumb? Mutant librarians! Mutant librarians! Oh, wait, so does the patron. Even worse! Mutant patrons! Mutant patrons! Run!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Friday!!!!!!!!

1. What time do you wake up on weekday mornings? Variable--usually between 8 and 8:30.

2. Do you sleep in on the weekends? How late? When I can. Usually until 9 or 10:00; if I really don't have to be anywhere at all and it's been a rough week, it could be noon or 1.

3. Aside from waking up, what is the first thing you do in the morning? Pee. Doesn't everyone?

4. How long does it take to get ready for your day? About 30-45 minutes, depending on if I have to take out the trash, have a meeting to dress up for, etc. I'm one of those shower/bath and go kinda girls.

5. When possible, what is your favorite place to go for breakfast? I hate to say this. *Vegetarian blushes*. I love McDonald's egg and cheese biscuits.